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Are you a true Gaslighter?

SweetSirRendering​(sub female)
3 years ago • Sep 4, 2020
Taramafor

i see what you are saying and this is where i personally prefer to avoid pasting a label on a person. rather than say someone is a gaslighter as a definition of who they are, but more a word to describe a set of behaviors that are rooted in lies. i personally do not participate in relationships with people who lie to me, except my teen about school, but we are working on that. hehe

there are many contributors to why a person behaves as they do, but if behaviors are effecting our mental health, as compassionate as we can be, it is unhealthy to sacrifice ones health simply because we are caring enough to understand why someone is behaving in a hurtful way.

for me, issues that breakdown trust have to be acknowledged and resolved or i have to move on.

i feel, honesty is an important boundary and should be mutually respected in a dynamic. there have been many difficult (to put it insanely mildly compared to the reality) relationships in the past where patterns of hurt broke both of us down, but they are no longer with me. i had patterns emerge in my current dynamic, but we hit the brakes and took care of each problem because we valued one another and had no intention to damage one another.

i hope if what you are expressing is a personal issue with a current painful relationship with someone, i hope you can also both find strength in your love for one another to find new ways to communicate so you can start to repair what may be broken or damaged