A Cloud(sub female){Owned}
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3 years ago •
Jul 22, 2021
Thank you CatLover - this thread has some interesting points for me to consider. Childhood or adolescent abuse is not my experience, but like all humans, there is trauma in my past.
I love being submissive and doing things for/to humans [that I let in]. I embrace vulnerability but also have a strong, defiant and feminist attitude that influences my interpretations and thinking. There are triggers but they seem to shift, depending on internal and external contexts. How do I set limits and boundaries if I change my mind, mood and desires constantly? There has been a shift in our dynamic. This comes after an extensive period of synchronised dancing together in pure bliss and complete isolation from the world. Then, 'reality' took over, my/our focus shifted and I/we lost much of the excitement for exploring new D/s and kink terrain. A void is felt between us; I think there is a communication breakdown caused by our fear of hurting [the other and the dynamic]. We subjectively interpret the actions and words of the other, hence we struggle to align our understanding and meaning. More self-enquiry, research and communication is always welcome (and needed) but I think time and attention paid to my sexual self and the dynamic is most important - gestures that inspire blooming, growth and desire are required. I/we do not confidently see how D/s best plays out in our dynamic at the moment, but despite my insecurity in embracing submission as part of me, I feel drawn to it. My tendencies and likes include: (I am curious as to my inclination, and sometimes reluctance, toward submission - What is submission for me? Am I submissive?) Direction and receiving Collar for play Choking on cock Hand on throat - minimal breath play Tied up Sensory deprivation Teasing and edging Impact play Sensations - Pleasure/pain, hot/cold, hard/soft, high intensity-no intensity Ass play Fantasising - group, females, blindfold Sound of female pleasure Multiple penetration - mouth, ass & cunt all at once Sensual touch and care Praises, complements Feeling the pleasure they get from my body Mastering a task or idea Dressing up Mimicking objects/furniture Rope bunny Dirty talk/names - whore, bitch (I call myself this when I am fantasising and horny) Kneeling positions (this is a sensitive area as it doesn't always sit well with me - excuse the pun) Name titles are used when they feel genuine eg. Sir - I have to want to say it Pleasing him, alongside my own pleasure/giving mood |
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