Gags and anal toys

Hey, i’m a trans guy who’s trying to work my way up to thicker anal plugs and dildos and longer as well (8-10 in.), but I’m having trouble because my ass is really tight and vaginal isn’t my preference. I’m also having trouble taking big ball gags and more than 1-2 inches for penis gags. For anal and oral, I want to be able to take my future partner mostly or fully. Any advice for anything?