Kinky Christian?

LifeAdventures​(switch female) • Jun 6, 2019

I believe that the Bible is clear about sex being a good thing between a husband and wife. The Bible is very clear about some things being sin. I always feel hesitant to share my thoughts on a public forum bc my goal is not to argue.

I have lived within the guidelines of my beliefs and outside of them. I feel happier when I am doing what I believe the Bible says to be true. I also believe that what happens between husband and wife is acceptable so long as it does not conflict with the Bible.

Believe it or not, we discussed BDSM in my Sunday School class a few months ago. I am part of the class that is run by the guy who runs the addictions program, so I think there tends to be a less pretentious group in there. Some are in recovery, some are not but that isnt the point. Basically, the discussion came up about whether inflicting harm intentionally was damaging God's vessel... one thing my sun school teacher warned was to be careful what we expose our minds and bodies to. There was a Bible verse about it. I gave it some thought. There are also verses about stripes being for the backs of fools and others that suggest inflicting physical harm in the form of welts is not a bad thing.

One cannot shop an online toystore without seeing scantily clad or naked models. There is a verse that says if a man lusts after a woman in his heart, that he has committed adultery.

With all respect, Jesus' sacrifice means that we no longer have to be justified under the old law for salvation. Blood sacrifices are no longer necessary. That said, his death does not strip us of the rules that are for our own good. The verses about love go like this:

"34But when the Pharisees had heard that he had put the Sadducees to silence, they were gathered together. 35Then one of them, which was a lawyer, asked him a question, tempting him, and saying, 36Master, which is the great commandment in the law? 37Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. 38 This is the first and great commandment. 39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. 40 On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets."--- Matthew 22:34-40.

If you love God with all your heart, soul and mind, it follows that you will want to please Him. He set the rules he did for a reason. I think a lot of people pay lip service to both this and loving your neighbor. The last verse is what solidifies my conviction that the 10 commandments are still valid today... verse 40 "on these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets." This means that if you follow just the two commandments here, you will naturally follow the rest.

Am I perfect? Absolutely not. Those closest to me know my internal conflicts. I do not judge anyone for theirs.

Just my thoughts with a little extra from Jesus.

Blessings

Just Jessy​(switch gender queer){Owned} • Jun 10, 2019

I'm going to add to this. "Sex outside of marriage" also includes threesomes, foursomes, and moresomes. Other than that, I pretty much agree!



I disagree with this. This is talking about our sins being cancelled through Jesus' death on the cross. Although the old law has mostly been fulfilled, the ten commandments are still important. My dad (who is a pastor, lol) described it like this:

Who wrote the 10 commandments? God wrote them with his own fingers in stone tablets and gave them to Moses. Who wrote the other several hundred commandments? Moses did, but God dictated them to him. They were also written a form of parchment. Stone is permanent, just like the 10 commandments, and they were written directly by God himself, so they are still to be followed. However, Moses wrote the other several hundred laws on perishable materials, so with Jesus' death, these laws were fulfilled and became null and void.

Other than that, I agree with everything you said!

Thank you all for your responses They were very helpful and enlightening to read. I pretty much agree with everything you guys said! Good luck on your journeys my fellow kinky Christians!

MisterMike​(dom male) • Jun 11, 2019

It is interesting, I met my soon to be bride on another bdsm site when we started discussing theology.
I am a “retired” minister (you never truly retire from ministry).
I served in churches for over 35 years.
I have struggled with my “kink” desires all of my adult life. Trying to work out my struggle with my faith.
I would struggle with extreme guilt, I would punish myself when I would “Fail”. I denied myself, prayed and ask God to take awAy my strong sex drive. He never did. As I approach my 60’s I still have a drive stronger than a lot of 20 year olds.
I don’t have any black and white answers. All I can say is that my faith is strong, I follow where He leads me and try to be the best Christian I can. God made me who I am, the Psalms teach us that we are wonderfully made, and that He knows even the number of hairs on our heads.
I am a dom, I struggle with my faith, but it is who God made me to be.
I hope this helps a little.

WaterDominant​(dom male) • Jun 11, 2019

I have always maintained that the husband/wife relationship described by Paul in the epistles is a Dom/sub relationship. And yes, I am an ordained minister lol

Fate • Jun 15, 2019

I am a Christian as well. I know several other Cager Christians who aren’t commenters here yet. Following this thread because I do struggle sometimes. Especially since God wants no others put before him-and he definitely deserves that-but I have a slave’s heart and want to be sure I’m not bordering on idolatry. It’s more about that than sexual sin in terms of my concerns with my faith and the lifestyle.

I can tell you that my D-s is more loving than any Christian relationship I havehad. The church could learn a LOT from BDSM practices. To be that intentional about intimacy and relationship, honesty, communication-all of it. So much deeper. Also true Lifestylers do not tolerate abuse or abusers. The church not only tolerates abuse and abusers for the most part, they enable and inadvertently collude with them too much of the time.

I’m glad you posted this topic.

LifeAdventures​(switch female) • Jun 15, 2019

@djinni I know that there are some Christians who only practice domestic discipline, but there are non-christians who follow this lifestyle choice as well. I believe DD was a key component to the success of my marriage to my late husband. I am Christian and so was my late husband, but religion really was not a reason behind our decision. Our rules were based on safety, respect and health. Things that were good for me. I introduced the idea to him before either of us were active with church.

Adult decision

Velvetdreams​(sub female) • Jun 16, 2019

Great discussion! I, too (or 3,4,5) am a "practising Christian," though not " religious." My understanding is that, unlike most organized religions that are built on rules and regulations, Christianity is based on an intimate, personal relationship with Jesus Christ. The only obvious conflict is with sex outside of marriage, but then the question arises, "How far is too far?" This is the decision for each adult. 😘 That's what the relationship helps with.
I'm enjoying the different thoughts here. Thanks for sharing!

The Beating Drums​(dom male) • Jun 16, 2019

I dunno if it's still a relevant movement, but a while back there was a specific intersection between Christianity and BDSM/Kink that was called the "Taken in Hand" movement.

I did a quick google search and while the movement seems to have slowly petered out, there *are* still people talking about it. I'd recommend you check out some of the communities, OP. As I'm not part of that particular aspect of the community, I'm afraid I can't recommend any particular group.

Yes!

Classiq{Yes} • Jun 17, 2019

Hello everyone! I am new here, and was elated to see this thread! My husband (my Sir) and I are both Christians, and we have not been successful in finding Christian fellowship in the community. I'm still trying to break the habit of saying "I'm not that kind of Christian" whenever the subject comes up and people get "that look." I do believe that the scripture supports a D/s relationship in marriage with the husband as the head of the family and I am excited to meet y'all!

Sincerely,
Classiq

interesting topic

BamaDom40​(dom male) • Jun 17, 2019

Im williing to bet, most have had conflict with this area more than most others. Statistically, we cant have such a high percentage of christians (as well as other faiths), along with any form of sex being a multi billion dollar industry, and pretend that secretly, one isnt helping the other. A topic on a sunday after church.....probably not, although it would make you look forward to the next sunday service. Botttom line is your sin is no different than mine. Premartial sex is a sin , according to the Bible. That is a sin I will ask God for forgiveness for. However, asking the preacher or fellow christians for forgiveness, is highly doubtful. Nor is asking permission first. I think we naturally get caught up in this perception that if your'e a christian, mother, father, or just an overall decent person, that your sexual desires and needs must be nonexsistent.