DrKrall
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4 years ago •
Apr 7, 2020
As the first NAP (Non-American Person) in this thread my view might differ slightly. I don't see the problem with having a session at the first date, just as i don't see a problem with sex on a first date. A session could be a one time thing or it could be something a bit more regular. In the vanilla world this would compare to a one night stand and say dating. If one or both partys make claims or demands on the other party it's not dating anymore but a relationship. Submitting to someone during play is one thing. Total submission is something else. In Europe most of us doesn't marry the first person we meet, but rather try them out first. In the same way I wouldn't consider a person who submitted to me once or twice at play to be my owned property.
I know what I want from a sub and from a relationship and I usually can tell on an early stage if I'm going to get it or not from the other person. Therefore I don't see the reason for these endless "get to know each other" periods so many think are so necessary. If this makes me less of a "true Dom" then be it so. Most of my relationships has been long and all of them have began very soon after we have made first contact. If there is no chemistry after a cople of days texting it's probably not going to happen, but if there is why wait? (OC if the other person is in a different country or even part of the world and meeting would consider relocating there might be more of a need for a "Get to know each other period" but if your both local ...) However, I totally agree that before anything happens limits and expectations should be discussed and a pefered level should be established. If the sub is new and inexperienced You don't give her/him 100 lashes with a bullwhip or something like that. Unfortunately not everyone understands this, but in my book this is where You have to take things slow. Not in the period leading up to it. But again. This is my point of view. I don't claim it's the one true way. |
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