The BDSM Test: Is it Useful To You?

cyndi lucy • Jul 25, 2018

I've never done one but I think questionnaires in general don't do a good job of identifying personalities. We are all multi-faceted.

FoxyPhilosopher​(sub female) • Jul 26, 2018

I've only just recently become familiar with this whole thing/universe, so I'm quite new. To everything.

I've taken the test 2 times over the last couple of days. As I took the test the first time I started to think about the results and the specific terms and looked around for more specifics on what each thing is to more detail. I began to think more on whether or not they actually fit on me. and as I go about thinking more about the results the more I look into the spectrum. Looking up more terms and thinking hardly whether or not it's actually something I'd want to do/experience.

It's quite hard to take something from - as what I understand - everybody agrees to disagree on what each term covers. And also given that it's a very broad level of it and doesn't take deeper notions of what each thing can be.

I like it for getting to know myself a bit better for now.

Taramafor​(sub male) • Jul 26, 2018

Oh, right. You might find the site "F-chat" useful. You can select EVERY kink on the site. There's... a lot. Took my like 3 hours to put them in the fav, yes, maybe and no categories. I gave each one some thought.

... I still ended up making about 10 custom kinks to add more detail to thinks. You can make "custom kinks" for that. So basically you're not as limited when it comes to explaining things when a label doesn't fit you.

dainix • Jan 18, 2019

Like it's always best to test things out by yourself. That's how you really find what you like or don't like.

But there is also part where things like personality tests in past have helped significantly to me understand myself. I learned about my natural strengths that I didn't know I have.

The same for sex language tests..kink tests...they help you to understand things about yourself that you took for granted. Then when you see how different other people results, you understand how everyone is different.

It's even better if you have a partner with whom you take the test together and then discuss the results.

the BDSM test itself wasn't too helpful to me.

But here’s another good test to take: https://sexualalpha.com/bdsm-kink-test/
It will tell which 1 of 6 is your primary sex language, how you get aroused, turned off and 3 kink ideas you’re most likely to enjoy!

After taking it I learned I'm Kinky Adventurer and my girlfriend is Tantra Lover.

I was surprised that she is so relying on senses..and with that knowledge after talking..adjusted how I arouse...play with the foreplay with her.

These things help a lot.. the more you know yourself AND your partner the better you'll be off.

But of course, it's no magic pill.

Fudbar​(dom male){❤️❤️❤️} • Jan 18, 2019

That test you linked was...umm... Not good.

It's obvious from this excerpt that the writer is talking out their ass...

"Usually men have more masculine (dominant) energy and women have more feminine (submissive) energy.

Opposites attract and that’s how we get attracted to opposite sex.

However in our society male/female are getting more equal which often doesn’t translate to exciting love life.

The way to fix is to introduce a role-play, power-play in your love life. One of the partners take a clear power role, while other person submits. You can also switch the roles as you like.

The most popular of these role-plays right now is DDLG – Daddy Dom / Little Girl.

There are 3 levels of this roleplay:

Hardcore: Master/Slave play. Where Master/Mistress take complete control over the life of his slave and all the responsibilities. It’s the most hardcore power play, that can add incredible novelty in your life.
Kinky: It’s where you play out Daddy / His Little Princess fantasy. Daddy takes care of his little princess, but sometimes Princess is a little brat and then she requires some punishment which leads to fun erotic foreplay.
Vanilla: It’s where you don’t involve any sexuality in the roleplay, but just stick to the Caregiver and Little relationship.
This play usually involves some dirty talk, punishments, rewards, rules, ownership etc."

There's SO much wrong in there I can't even begin to delve into it, but as an actual Daddy Dom, that is possibly one of the most inaccurate descriptions of DD/lg I've ever read.

EDIT: Note the use of 'role play' throughout. No understanding of BDSM. I'm not playing fucking dress up games for a night, and few are. Role play is a link onto itself, and using it as a description for all kink is demeaning and insulting.

dainix • Jan 18, 2019

Can you please clarify what was so wrong..?
Your passion is ehm - strong

Maybe it's just the words mean to you different things..? How would you categorise and explain it then?

I'm here to learn, since for me it felt very accurate and helped our sexual understanding with me and my girlfriend.

Would appreciate more explanation - on your understanding of BDSM.

Great comments

Freya369 • Jan 18, 2019

We shift don't we? ...our energy shifts....I am not sure ..it's even close to scientific...but makes fascinating reading!l

Zaramia​(dom female) • Jan 18, 2019

I came up at 100% submissive, brat, and rope bunny - I am probably close to 100 percent submissive once I choose to submit, I'm always looking at the rules, looking at the loopholes, and choosing when I will bend or break them, and I am an artist, really truly - so much of rope is art, so there's not just the sexual component in any of it, for me.

If your test results come up in the 100% degrader/sadist categories, we might be friends, but that's a darker path than I generally prefer to walk, in a relationship, so I really feel that it would be a rather unsatisfying endeavor for both of us... If it's your thing, rock on, but you are going to have a lot more fun if I am not walking that path with you... Where is that damned candle, again???

It's entertaining, for sure, but a baseline or a conversation starter, really.

Fudbar​(dom male){❤️❤️❤️} • Jan 18, 2019

Edit; deleted duplicate post.

Fudbar​(dom male){❤️❤️❤️} • Jan 18, 2019

I honestly meant what I said; I could write a 1000 word essay on all the misconceptions in that article. The writer clearly isn't a BDSM practicioner but rather a writer who did some hasty internet research trying to make a deadline.

Most of it is 'borrowed' from "5 love languages", which I do recommend.

It's heteronormative as fuck.

It confuses roleplay with kink, doesn't acknowledge lifestyle or 24/7, RACK/SSC, or safe words.

It's bedroom only advice for vanilla couples

Leaves out a ton of kinks.

Doesn't understand difference between M/s, D/s, and switch.

I could go on, but I'll say this instead; you got the most out of it by reading and discussing results with a partner. The benefit you got from it was real, but that says nothing about the validity of the writer or test. You could bond with your partner just as much by discussing the menu at a restaurant. You learned what the other likes, but doesn't mean the food is any good. ?