Seriously seeking a mentor for specific topic advice.

Seriously seeking a mentor for specific topic advice.

SirMatteo​(dom male) • Dec 15, 2018

I am hoping to find another Dom personality to discuss some issues regarding the reintroduction of certain things with a submissive who was, previously, terribly abused.
::some background::
I was fortunate enough to find the person on this planet that I am convinced was specifically designed to make me happy in all aspects of life.
I have been involved heavily in this lifestyle for 19 years. she has been involved a slightly shorter time. I have been fortunate enough to have met SSC people and mentors for my entire interest and evolution as a Dom. Unfortunately, she was not so lucky. she realised her interest and role when she was young and went searching to fill her needs. she found the exact opposite of SSC... she met a couple who had a f slave already. Things progressed quickly and seemed ok at first. By the time she realized it most certainly was NOT ok, she was not in the right position or mindset to get away.
This is a touchy topic, I know. But its not just controversial subject matter for us, its life. So if anyone has interest in learning more and hearing us, and what we need, out, I would be grateful.
Any thoughts and ideas are welcome. Thank you everyone!

MasterBear​(other butch) • Dec 15, 2018

Hello.

I'm available


What are you looking to reintroduce?

SirMatteo​(dom male) • Dec 15, 2018

Many things. After a decade of healing and building our life and relationship she says she is very ready for her role again. I am a Dominant and a sadist. she is submissive and a masochist.
7 years she spent at the hands of people who were neither safe, saner or nor consensual. Subhuman is the only word I have for her treatment and experience during that time.
Its been a long, slow traveled road. I was more than willing to put my role aside to allow her to heal and grow. In that time she has become my wife as well.
I'd like to work with someone who maybe has experience with this type of situation; healing and moving past an abusive lifestyle relationship and letting it back into your life after having survived what she did.

DrWakko • Dec 15, 2018

When looking for a mentor I suggest getting involved in your local community and see who handles things the way you do and like.

I use the following rules when it comes to mentors:

1. A mentor should be of the same sex/gender so there is no sexual tension or want. A mentor should NEVER have sex with those they mentor.

2. A mentor should never volunteer themselves. Usually someone who volunteers has alternative motives. Pick your mentor to you wants and needs.

You can also ask community leaders on who they think would be a good fit for you.

These are my rules for being a mentor. You need to do whats best for you when deciding a mentor.

Good luck

DW

SirMatteo​(dom male) • Dec 15, 2018

I have tried locally. We are in a VERY small town and the nearest real meetups are over an hour from us. This is why I have reached out in this format. I am open to email, text and even chat if needed. I just need the right person to hear what her healing has done for her and I and how we can progress from here.

DrWakko • Dec 15, 2018

I would get D/s relationship contract (they are all over Google). Start slow and renegotiate every 6months (or what ever you feel right).

I suggest getting the following books:
The Loving Dominant
Bdsm relationships by Peter Masters
Also book by Dr Bob might help

I suggest this for anyone who wants to get into a D/s relationship for the first time or who just wants to take it slow.

DW