Online Social Cues

Online Social Cues

Misterasmodai​(dom male) • Mar 7, 2020

Putting ghosting on the back burner for now, I have noticed another trend that is bothering me.
People who continue the ongoing conversation despite having no interest in going anywhere with the approaching party.
I imagine this stems from a disdain or outright fear of conflict; or even from the good intention of not wanting to hurt someone’s feelings. Either way, it never ends well.
I can see how some of the messages shared may qualify as social cues, if operating with the mindset that some people write as though they are speaking.
Social cues do not always translate well to messaging apps.
While it may be difficult (I have experienced this difficulty plenty of times myself, and have not always made the best choice in going about dealing with them), the best way to convey disinterest is to simply and clearly state disinterest.
Any healthy person will move on and recover from rejection. It happens all the time. And, it is no one’s responsibility to cater to someone with unhealthy coping responses.
I generally strive to be upfront with my interests and intentions in any conversation I engage in, as well as to consistently verify continued interest if it does not seem outwardly apparent; yet I am still met with an assurance of interest followed by one word responses, no attempt to make time for necessary conversation, and no real follow through.
The only way rejection will have a deep and justifiable effect on someone is if something is allowed to develop, and that is exactly what happens when we feign interest to protect feelings or avoid conflict.

Misterasmodai​(dom male) • Mar 7, 2020

I believe it is also important to note that you should never feel ashamed of having preferences regarding what kind of partner you want. While a lack of success may benefit from opening up on particularly specific wants, there is nothing wrong with being attracted to a specific kind of person, especially if that kind of person fits more effectively into your lifestyle.
I work out daily, so I tend to prefer subs who are in decent shape.
I would say that there is something to be said for preferences that are attainable, like being in good shape or being open minded as opposed to being a certain height or skin color or having large breasts; but in the end, the only wrong answer to the question of acceptable terms of attraction is a lack of attraction.