Very First Threesome

Very First Threesome

ScarlettRopeBunny​(sub female){Yes} • Mar 10, 2020

How do you vet people you're bringing into the bedroom, to take part in a threesome?

Ok, so I'm thinking about having a threesome with my partner of 7 years. He's had two previous threesomes, with people he already knew, but this will be my first time. This time around we've agreed that it would be best to share this with someone we don't know. That being said, how do we ensure the new partner(s) is/are drug and disease free? We value our health very much. It terrifies me to think that what *should* be a fun experience could turn into a lifetime of consequences because of an unexpected STI. Any advice would be greatly appreciated and thank you for reading. 💓

FearlessBrat​(sub female){H.PL.} • Mar 10, 2020

First of all. If you feel hesitant, don't do it.
Secondly, you can all do STI testing on all the same time. I think 10 is full panel. Keep in mind there is no CDC recommended HPV testing for men in USA. So you won't know for sure. For women have them have current pap smear with HPV testing. Also check if you can request DNA HPV testing versus RNA. Depending of female's age not all ob/gyn perform it as a standard...do your research on that in your state...
Of course you can do drug testing on all three parties...you can research it in your state where can you have it done.
When you advertise for who you are looking for have all those facts stated. This way of course no suprises are there for either party.

MasterBear​(other butch) • Mar 11, 2020

The important part is to sit down before the event occurs and negotiate with your partner what are your needs.

Do you need to see testing before you atart? If so how long ago are testing results ok? Is protection going to be used? Are there certain acts that are absolutely nos?

What needs to be done prior to during and post encounter that helps you to reconnect to your primary? How do you deal with the emotional fall out? Should there be one.


Consider going into a three-way like playing with a new partner. Look at it from the vantage point of negotiation.

FunCouple{.-Couple-.} • Mar 11, 2020

You could advertise your desire on the CDC blog, if they have one.
“Seeking sexy CDC employee” etc.
Who ever you choose, have that conversation with them as part of the process of whittling out the fruitcakes.

If Kitty and I ever pull our proverbial finger out, and corral that Unicorn, it’ll be something we shall be doing.
Checks all around for our safety and for that of the Unicorns.

PS..... remember, nothing will be 100% guaranteed.

Hope this helps
FC

Miki​(masochist female) • Mar 11, 2020

My 2 cents?

Know who you'll be banging. That goes for good ol' 2-somes let alone 3-somes or more.

Truth be told, I've done multiples-- "gang bangs" if you will, but I knew those involved, wasn't worried about STDs or any of that shit-- and enjoyed it thoroughly, as did they (or so they said... ) Because I had known all involved long enough!

To cut to the chase, as to the original post; -- If you're worried about vetting those who come to your bedroom, you have it backwards.

The decision to have a multiple-partner sexual adventure should come AFTER you know the participants.
As in: when the decision to all jump into the sack is made, it's made because you're comfortable with the participants, not the other way around.

ScarlettRopeBunny​(sub female){Yes} • Mar 12, 2020

Thank you all so much for your responses, it means a lot. I feel more confident navigating this venture now and, seeing as this was my first post, I feel comfortable asking follow up questions within this community. ❤️ Thank you again for the support and advice, this newbie feels much more at ease.

Miki​(masochist female) • Mar 12, 2020

Don't short-change yourself! Do the preliminaries and be careful--- But after all that, have FUN! You'll love it! I know I did, anyway!

The original Her​(switch female) • Mar 14, 2020

Everyone is seemingly talking about STI testing and doubts going into it, so hopefully I'll bring a new perspective here.

Whether it's a man or a woman who is your third, please don't put too much pressure on them. You've been with your partner for +7 years now, which is amazing. Congrats to you However, you know them so much better sexually, and there's always a lot of stress on the unicorn (third) to be, well, a unicorn. Something so amazing that it can't possibly exist, and someone who has to be ideal for the man and the woman both.

Threesomes don't really go ideally the first time, you know? Or at least, that's what I've experienced and had others chat with me about. Don't be afraid for some things to be a little awkward, have some communication, and get to know the third before you're sure you want them included in this.

Good luck, and best wishes!