InstaDoms on this site

InstaDoms on this site

Moonfairy​(sub female) • Feb 25, 2021

I'm very new here, as of yesterday, and I don't know if there's is a place to tell other subs who to stay away from on here. I've already encountered a bad one. I think that a less experienced sub would have been run right over and not understood that his method is inappropriate. I don't know what to do about this, and I don't want subs who are new to this lifestyle to be taken advantage of by him. If someone could give me some direction here, it would be appreciated. Thank you 😊

dollMaker​(dom male) • Feb 25, 2021

Unfortunately there are plenty of instas, fantasists, wanabe and abusers on here. The subs here a good long while know who they are, subs talk. Morley and alawey worth talking to.

Admin are worth contacting and passing on screen shots of any problematic messages and people on here.

I hope you find what you are looking for.

House Talion​(dom male) • Feb 25, 2021

Every site you visit will have plenty of inta/ubber/wanna-be Dom/mes a plenty. Take your pick, do with them as you wish, and remember to clean up any mess tou make.

Sadly ive seen posts like this too often as theyre still around, but thankfully it shows ppl still care

Moonfairy​(sub female) • Feb 25, 2021

Ok thank you both for your help. It's just frustrating to experience that. I must say, though, this is this best site I've seen by far.

Literate Lycan​(dom male) • Feb 25, 2021

Welcome. As dollMaker mentioned, a number of submissive who have been around probably have an excellent feel for who may be an Insta or even just downright poser. In addition to the two excellent individuals he names (Alaway and Morley) any of the fairly regular bloggers / Forum posters who have been around a minute (or more than a year) might also be a good source.

The problem with creating a place or list means that one bad interaction between a submissive and Dominant might put an otherwise decent Dom on the list. Best method is word of mouth and reputation. As some of the better blogs often warn, “Vet them”. I’m glad you were experienced enough to avoid the bad individual you chanced upon.

Moonfairy​(sub female) • Feb 25, 2021

Thank you, I understand what you mean about possibly putting out a bad word about a good Dom. I just wanted to ask to get a feel for this community and how things work here. I'm already sad for any inexperienced sub that may encounter him ☹️. Anyway, thank you for your guidance 😊.

Cloud69​(switch male) • Feb 25, 2021

I am annoyed with all the posts being so negative. I get that it's bad but everyone makes a thread about this topic or similar on almost a daily basis. This is just the way people talk on the internet I'm afraid. Getting upset about it all the time is not good for you. Plus I have more fun talking with them and messing with them:) talk shit get treated like shit.

dollMaker​(dom male) • Feb 25, 2021

@Cloud69 you don't get to decide who can indicate, or express hurt or frustration over what happens on the site, either on a blog or in the forum. Yes there are lots of similar posts because there are a good number of problem people here and arriving daily. And saying, ohh its just the net, and suck it up, shows a complete lack of understanding, or empathy.

So I am going to suggest you write about your frustration in your blog, and not seek to devalue, dismiss Moonfairy's post, or anyone else's, as negativity which frustrates you. Doing this, I think, is very disrespectful.

This smells like shaming to me and seeking to shut down, shut someone up re expressing their feelings, and experiences.

Moonfairy​(sub female) • Feb 25, 2021

@Cloud69 I'm not easily offended and this wasn't a case of "oh he was mean to me". I am not inexperienced in this lifestyle and I was simply trying to get a feel for the way things are done here. As I stated in my post, my concern was for subs who are new to the lifestyle and who may not know that his methods are not acceptable.

@dollMaker thank you for your support and for your suggestion that his feelings may be better placed in a blog. Thankfully, I am made of tougher stuff than that which would feel ashamed or dismissed by the opinions of others.

dollMaker​(dom male) • Feb 25, 2021

@Moonfairy that may be so of you, and that's good, but that may not be so of others. My concern, for you, and others is that it might silence, or drive people away who feel that they have no outlet suitable to share their poor experiences except on here, or share anything they want to. I hate seeing people coming along and weighing in, in such away, as might discourage them from posting and taking part, might make them feel invalid, worthless, because others don't want to see it, read it, because its not all fluff and sunlight.

The lifestyle is fun and great and all, but not everything is, and those with bad experiences, or negative ones, who need to vent, talk about it, to inform others, seek support, should be made welcome to do so and share their experiences, as long as they don't break the sites rules.

For those like cloud69, if you don't want to see it, don't read it, stay on the fluff and sunlight stuff, but don't try and silence and shut down those that have had issues that don't fall under fluff and sunlight.