Is it normal that the idea of being inflicted pain upon and being degraded appeals to a person but at the same time when it is actually happening the person in question might be wishing for anything else but the situation he/she is in currently? And then again when he/she looks back at it, the pain is what they find most arousing.
Well I can't tell you what's normal but I can say that I'm exactly the same way. I'm alpha tempered so for me it's hard to let go and sometimes I just want to lash out, but I don't. I behave. Sometimes the pain is too much but I know I need it. I have my reasons, as many do. Sometimes the best part is when it's all over and your skin is warm and tingly. It's comforting. Like putting on warm clothes fresh out of the dryer on a cold day.
Thank you. It's quite assurung knowing that there are others out here who think and feel the same way.
Also would it be justified to call that person who enjoys the idea of pain and not when actually going through it a masochist?
I consider my self to be masochistic, but I think the answer to that depends on the mindset of the individual. Is it curiosity? Is it a fantasy that isn't meeting reality? Or are they just learning about themselves and finding out what they need? Maybe the internal struggle is part of the fun...
Let me pose this question to you. Have you, honestly, ever met anyone whom you would consider "Normal?" What is normal for you may be the most abhorrent thing to me. Many "vanilla" people consider themselves normal and they consider those of us in the lifestyle to be abnormal.
So! For what you experience during your submitting, is actually normal....for you. And that is a good thing. Because it gives you a final reassurance that what you are doing is...normal.
My only suggestion would be to enjoy everything about being in the lifestyle and quit worrying about what I or anyone else thinks. My normal is certainly not close to your normal so I can't tell you what is normal for you. Only you will ever be able to decide that.
Ah. A well-written reply to my question. @SirPain. I couldn't help but be impressed by the manner in which you considered my question and came up with this intellectual answer. Quite a pleasure to know your thoughts. Thank you.
First, I "categorized" myself on my profile as a sub female but am heavily leaning towards changing it to "masochist" female because, from what I have read elsewhere in here and now seeing the word "normal" bandied about I guess I am more of a masochist than the "normal" concept of a sub. I enjoy the pain, being subdued, and "degraded" that goes with being rendered vulnerable and (am I supposed to dance around the words, if so, please let me know-- really!?) being flogged, whipped or paddled. For me it's highly erotic and leads to more complete satisfaction.
In case I missed the whole point of your question, -- Is it normal to feel a bit of regret while being punished? For me, no.. But I am sure there are remnants of one's upbringing in the mix that are as hard-wired as potty training that gives rise to doubts.
The key is if it gets to be too much an intrusion on your experience, you might want to step back and re-examine the situation. "It's No Good If You Gotta Force It."
I have had my body subjected to a lit cigarette, nipples, balls and stubbed out in my belly button. Unfortunately this was never videod. A couple of weeks ago, I dabbed my balls and the end of my cut cock with a lit cigarette, on video and uploaded onto a pornsite.
I loved doing it but really want someone to do it for me. Preferably with another person present to video it. I want to be tied up, blindfolded and gagged.
Any takers ? I can be available normally Monday to Friday from 11-30am but you must be gone by 3-00pm. It is too near Christmas now so, how about sometime in January ? XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX.
@mikkee30 Umm, did you read the original post? The topic might seem too general, but she was asking for input from other subs as to whether having regrets while being punished/disciplined was "normal".
Your post fits in this site somewhere but you might want to start your own thread on the topic of what sort of pain one has been subjected to and/or likes the most.