Dom/sub mental health

Dom/sub mental health

ChasingAva​(sub female) • Jun 9, 2022

Looking for advice/info please as someone very new to this…

Does anyone have experience with a Daddy Dom/sub relationship that work where there has been childhood trauma and/or a pre-existing condition like ADHD/ADD please. The need for appropriate care/therapy is obvious but assuming those steps have been taken (and have been as successful as they can be) is there anything that would be helpful for that relationship to work? Again assuming that communication is good and boundaries have been set and supported..

Thank you X

Literate Lycan​(dom male) • Jun 9, 2022

Speaking from limited experience, you indicate appropriate care and therapy has been taken and is as successful as they can be. As an additional thought for your consideration and no answer is necessary: were they BDSM and kink-friendly therapists? If so, awesome. If not specifically or you didn't bring up the topic, it's good to address your lifestyle choices in session.

My thoughts are there are benefits with a good D/s dynamic when orchestrated properly with well established communication and boundaries (as you indicate). Any traumatic event, or condition, whether from childhood or recent event such as assault, rape or other violent events (war, crime, etc) should be discussed and included to avoid potential triggers and prepare the appropriate response between the partners should a trigger occur. This prepares both parties for an event should it be triggered. You hit the nail on the head: communication.

I think you are definitely taking a helpful step by considering this and asking the question. All the best!

ChasingAva​(sub female) • Jun 9, 2022

Thank you for your thoughts, to be honest I didn’t even consider if we had any “kink friendly therapists “ over here! I will look into it 🙏🏼

Sensualgent​(dom male) • Jun 10, 2022

Dear Ava,

Your relationship is what you make it together. What's most important is heartfelt honesty, care, empathy and love. Each prioritising the other and with those commitments any challenges can be overcome.

Both adhd and childhood trauma can strip away confidence leaving anxiety and fear and feeling you are not worthy of love. Sharing your vulnerability can be very scary but I can tell you without doubt you are 100 percent worthy of your DD's love and devotion.

Receiving counselling and medication from psychiatrists specialising in adhd and childhood trauma will resolve many of your fears and challenges and your DD should want to be involved as much as possible.
In fact your Daddy Dom or any lover worthy of your trust and heart in a D's relationship or otherwise will learn all he can of your needs so he can support, love and protect you.
You should feel safe to be vulnerable with him and if you aren't sure then move at your pace. He will be anxious to care , love and protect you but will understand.

In short, confiding in your Daddy Dom will relieve your anxieties, strengthen your bond and your DD will love You all the more for it.
Isn't that what we really want ! Xxx

Spearance • Jun 10, 2022

I can only speak as a daddy dom with ADD my partner had trauma from child hood. I had to learn her triggers and we worked on the together. She wanted me to help her through them. I had her write a journal how she felt during certain things. It helped me and her learn about her. Write down what triggered what did not. How it made you feel. When you got close to being triggered and what helped you feel safe.

Well the ADD/ADHD I focus on something in my mind and play music it it helps If you can split your concentration like think of a small thing let it take a little bit of your mind so the rest can focus on the pleasure. Use your safe words they are important.

I hope this helps