Hello I can for sure say i am in the wrong era as far as tehology goes. I am just now learning how to use online sites and exactly how to meneuvre them. Other then that just that I am 46 years old . I have 4 adult children who have now all moved out of the house the last in t fall'.
It is all new to me, expressing aloud the things I have thought, desired, wanted for many years. I know that I get confused because I always assumed I would be the dominant. Being asked this year to take on that role, I was excited. It went as well as I believe it could have. He was a more versed member of the community, and I just entering or allowing myself to experience in reality not just thought. It was more of a playtime for him, where I wanted it to be an everyday exchange. Soon understood it was a sexual only exchange he was requiring. I saw so much more and needed and wanted so much more. We ended with no issue and I have been left to try and figure out exactly what it is I am wanting. The thing is I want from both sides I think and am not sure how to move forward. There are aspects of dominant that are fitting perfect, most for me would be stirred in that direction. But I have also had just in short encounters experienced being the submissive and surprising to myself found it to be very enlightening. Though I don't believe I could ever truly submit myself to any being. So I will continue on this journey and see what each step forward brings.