Positive Relationships (R): Reflect on the quality of interpersonal relationships in your life. Do you have enough time with the people you care about? Are you able to demonstrate your positive feelings toward the people you care about in your life? What degree of support, laughter, joy, etc. do you offer and receive from these relationships?
Score Range : 0 to 10
R : 1
I have almost no positive relationships and have a near inability to have maintain or foster such relationships. I know what I am good at and the connection and relation with others isn't it. I believe this is a direct result of me having suffered damage to my first attempts at attachment. When I was born due to a situation my first few months were in a foster facility which clearly was so overrun and poorly staffed I had already learned not to bother crying since no one will ever come to aid me. By the time my mother did decide to try and raise me although due to her youth (teenage pregnancy) and a drug problem without help she wasn’t much better then total neglect since it was abusive. Being left alone or tormented on the daily by your mother who claims they “love you”. Thus it isn’t surprising someone who started out in my situation as their operative mode finds people who wish to interact with them dubious in nature and deed.
I still see myself as the child not even a mother could love the idea that a random stranger could ever love me or truly care just seems impossible. Thus my logic is anyone’s attempt at connection must therefore be discounted out of hand as them either being: mistaken, misguided, or looking to mislead me. I am the lone wolf, I seek no comfort from others although for those I have deemed worthy I’d bleed for them. I value others’ lives above my own. I lack the capacity to have human relations and have nearly no one who cares about me thus almost every life is more important than my own. People tend to have family, friends, and people who count on them. When I am gone I won’t even be missed thus I am always at the ready to make alchemy happen and exchange my peace and life for another’s.