Ice Girl's public thoughts.

Jesus is a hero of mine - even as an atheist 🪷

Some people don't understand my behavior because it's illogical. Just tonight I was told I have a Savior complex because I don't care about myself enough and to be frank I consider that a good thing.

When people have asked me who really know me what are my plans coming up tonight.

I said one of the benefits of the increased income when my training is done I can open my home to queer non binary and trans people who don't have a place to live and maybe offer them rents of a dollar where they sign a lease so that way if I technically have a problem I can point to a contract they violated.

People think I'm going to far.

I have said it over and over again I was homeless, I literally slept on friends couches and begged for food to survive for a time. I was an Intersex child born to a drug addict that lost custody of me.

I know my roots I know how hard it was for me to get where I am. I feel I have been unbelievably lucky and to an extent blessed to finally have an opportunity to help more people with my good fortune that is to come.

People say what about me well when you come from a life where you had holes in your shoes ripped shirts and have dumpster dived to eat I don't need a dime really.

Jesus said "If you want to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.”

"For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many"

"Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves"

I was rasied Catholic went to Catholic school and even though I have come to no longer be a practicing Catholic I have been for lack of a better term brainwashed to think life in service to others, of self sacrifice is it's own reward.

I have only a couple of selfish desires I want to own a Ducati ( as a motorcyclist and an Italian who appreciates beauty it is imperative)

I want to travel to Italy to see the home of my grandfather and grandmother who came to this country and light a candle in there church for them and thank them for the opportunity they have given to me.

And

Go to Japan if it wasn't for my early love of martial arts showing me focus dedication and discipline I wouldn't be half of who I am today.

After that so long as I am alive and breathing what do I care for money?

Are people remembered for the amount of money they amassed in there lives or for the people they touched. - read can't take it with you -

What matters is your priorities in life and mine are to make as big an impact on others people's lives as possible and the fact I have spent most my life destitute the idea of making 140,000+ each year is actually borderline gross 🤮

In a perfect world we would already be in a star trek pure socialist society where people are cultivated loved and supported to live there passions. No one should fear the jaws of death by capitalism where it's produce starve or go homeless.

This goes to my childhood where I used to pray for someone to care about me or help me and no one answered.

The cold detachment of the world caused me to want to be someone who lives up to my childhood ideal of what someone in a position of authority should be like.

Selfless, kind, charitable, supportive, honest, resolute, passionate, on and on.

There is the saying be the change you wanna see in the world. What is so awful about wanting to give and give and give of myself to others until there is nothing left to give but blood and tears?

Some might say that's crazy - for me it's actually the inner Catholic in me saying if anything I should find a way to sacrifice more for the people around me because any blessings I have received an after life or not should be spent in service to others.

Even if Jesus is just a fable, I wanna live in a world where someone really does ask themselves what would Jesus do and tries within reason to accomplish it.

If that makes me problematic for some I accept it. I cannot be someone I'm not.