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Well it's been a while..... been super busy. In 2021 I thought I found my forever, in fact I could have sworn on it.... so much so that when he told me to burn the boats/bridges I went a step further and burned my map as well so making it back home has been rough. My old house and property was an abandoned ruin and I went from only having 60k debt to well over 250k. Men if your wondering this is why girls don't want to give up their jobs and say in budgeting because if it goes the crap... well it usually is pretty bad. But one year later I have my debt back under control. I have gutted my abandoned and destroyed house and started to rebuild. I'm making half of what I made with him but somehow paying down or paid off over 100k in debt. My son is thriving his schooling is off the charts and self control is so much better now. Sadly all this recovery has made it hard, no almost impossible to ever want to relinquish control to anyone else. Why would I at this point there isn't anything I need that I can do myself. Electrical? Got it. Plumbing? Got it. Drywall deconstruction and construction. Finance and investing? Got it. Steady work? Got it. Planning? Got it, and I can still cook clean and craft. So at this point the only thing I'm sad about is this... what I lost was the side of me who wanted to be loved and cherished. Now I just want to be quiet and alone.