I only exist in the space of the other. My strength, my joy, my love - We are the moments we share.
I have no title, no absolutes, no fixed adornment. I am not submissive in the sense that it is in me and absent in another. I am what I am at the time that I am. I am submissive to all and to no one. I submit to the world in complete faith of its wisdom, acceptance, love and deliverance.
I cannot be defined in absolutes but can be labelled with qualifiers just for common understanding and no more - ever disrupting, ever changing, ever subsiding, ever becoming.
I grow into another and another. Or is it that I strip down to become less and less.
Standing naked in the kitchen with her head jammed inside the fridge, she imagined how her ass looked from the front door. Her pussy, swollen with aching need, cursed her stupid, arrogant ways and decided that this bitch was going to pay.
The head in the fridge spoke back, “I was just making a point; I didn’t think he would ban our play for that excruciating length of time.” With these words, frustrated disappointment echoed from white plastic and rested in her ear. The desire to touch herself became painfully unbearable. She summoned the last of her reserves to focus on the cool air touching her face rather than the fire burning in the lower half of her body. Still the flashes of her ass and pussy getting ravaged persist.
She attempts conversing with her pussy once again, only to be ignored, “I cannot take this anymore. I need to tie my hands or I really will be sorry, and not the good kind of sorry.” Her voice wavered from the teasing melody it usually carried – she really was desperate.
It was a nice idea but she was frozen, immobile with the fear of desperation. For she immediately thought of going straight to the chair and sitting on her two favourite dildos. The fire inside was raging and at least the fridge was keeping it at bay. It must be so late, she thought, and wondered when he was going to return and alleviate this burning desire so carefully engineered.
Frozen in carnal indecision, it was now a matter of life or death.
Her cunt needed to be fed.
It was just like him to walk in at that moment. Of course, he stopped and breathed this fine moment deeply in. This was not going to be easy for her. She needed to think carefully to get what she wanted – needed.
He feigned pity as he watched her writhe with unrelenting lust, carnal desperation to have him take her and relieve her of this base need. She knew he would not be so easily tempted. He knew she held many reserves of determined grit. They both knew she led him willingly to her chosen demise. She had taken her punishment with grace unsurpassed; he was alive with pride. But he could never have even conceived such an engaging and perfect finale!
His blood boiled with the sight, smell and heat in the air; he struggled to control those urges of frantic hunger.
“Please Sir,” she said meekly. “Please, I need you to make me cum.”
“In time kitten,” he said with the air of patient, unconcerned composure. “If you’re a good girl, I’ll let you suck my cock, then we’ll see.”
She breathed out with a forced sigh as she held back the rage inside her.
The warm, enclosed blanketing of the womb is our ultimate safe space. It is the archetype of safety, love and nurture because it is the first place we experience that connection.
Skin to skin contact and firm embrace are physical needs.
My skin, my body boundless, reaching further and further in empty space, seeking resistance in the form of gentle pressure, of warm embrace, of physical connection.
Emotions and thoughts firing to a state of jumbled nonsense and disconnection.
The awareness of entering a binding session initiates the transition of mind to a calm, focused space. Clarity grows as nonsense departs. Feelings of comfort come to the fore as sensations become acute.
Attentiveness is easily given to the sensations and physicality of current moments.
A torso harness begins. My body drops into relaxation but is receptive to being molded. It follows instruction with no question or side thought - complete trust and willingness.
Peace, stillness and attentiveness come to me as my focus remains on the sensations of movement and pressure. As the firm rope is extended around my torso I find myself needing pressure and aesthetic balance. My desired firmness and aesthetic sensibility - such an art.
The harness finished binds me in comfort but connected to the world - formed and molded to return to the purity of an infant organism.
I am cocooned. I am bound. I am in submission to what is bigger and what is beyond. I am cocooned.
Trigger Warning: A heads up that this narrative depicts a Consensual Non Consensual scene.
'Cocoon'
It was time. He had washed every accessible part of my body, attended to my supple skin and adorned me in silk cloth. Always with such serenity and attention to detail did he move; it made every sensation pronounced. My body vibrated.
Silk cloth caressed my cheek - darkness softened my mind but my body was humming with electricity. Firm. The pressure was always perfect with him.
There was a long moment of silence – he was inspecting.
“What a stunning whore you make.” He moved closer behind me and whispered, “No words ever suffice.” In a more serious tone, he asked, “Are you ready?”
I smiled, “Yes Sir, I belong to you.”
Silence was given. I could not hear or see but my skin was absorbing all sensation; the slightest movement caused my body to purr. My sense of self left and what remained was a body of nerve endings, hypnotised by his sweet song.
So gently was I taken to this cold, hard unknown place that I was utterly shocked and scared when several strong hands grabbed my flesh and hair and dragged my stunned body to a suspension apparatus. The riggers were obviously well versed in the art of bondage; they had my hands and feet bound and my cunt, ass and head perfectly positioned. The ropes were tight, almost unbearable, but the discomfort calmed my fear.
Sound was returned to me for a moment – three male voices? Or was it five? The voices all different but they were deep and raw; I could hear their lust. They were animals discussing how to consume their prey. I felt my pussy dripping and could even hear my juice spilling to the floor. Movement – someone was underneath me and once again my sound disappeared.
Sucking. Licking. Biting. Slapping. Pulling. Grabbing. Flogging. Whipping. Pinching. Fucking. Choking. Gagging. Plugging. They did it all. Multiple times in multiple ways. Every hole was filled over and over. No part of my body was left unused. Sound was given and taken. Lustful words were spoken to me – whispered, grunted and growled. They savoured my body, enjoyed the taking and rewarded it with unrelenting pleasure.
There was no life left in my body or mind; I couldn’t move, think or make words. Released from my binding, I was carried to a bed. There I felt the cocoon of him hold me for an unknowable length of time.
With my crackly voice I thought I might read one of my favoured pieces of writing. This is
Ode to Water
Water,
With all your wisdom, beauty and power, I am in awe.
Beckon me toward your house, let me lay at your feet. Grace me with your unspeakable caress; take my body and release me from my flesh. Hold me while I learn to be in your presence, that place of privilege. Know me, in all my past, present and future, and let me worship you with all my truth.
Wash the flesh away. Show me raw, naked and pure.
Take me as you need to, to the depths of my soul, to the depths of your saintly core. And in return, I give you all. I will honour all that you whisper in my ear. I open my body, my flesh, my mind, my being for you in complete faith of your light, your complete knowing. Let me be worthy of your wisdom, beauty and power.
Well, well, well - nice to see you all taking it easy.
You look a bit too comfortable, too complacent, too familiar in your Sunday dress.
What you need is a good shock to the system.
https://dai.ly/x2eo1
There is an absence that's burning with desire - the memory fading but an ache remains.
Consumed by the thought; I really need to be punished - I need sting, I need throb and I really need a good shock to the senses.
Let's start sloooooowwww.....
'Secretary' 2002 - Like Rocky Horror, this film can never be seen too many times 🖤.
Mmm yes please.
The preliminary show is drawing to a close folks but to complete the well-roundedness of multimedia and sensory stimulation, I'll leave you with a sound bite 💋✌️.
French Philosopher Simone Weil described attentiveness as a "need of the soul".
Attentiveness is to be present deliberately and devote ones whole being to a single activity, object or person.
(For ADHDers, it is called hyperfocus 😝.)
The following video is an artwork by Bill Viola titled 'Ascension'. He encapsulates the essence of "quieting the mind", a term you are familiar with in the context of BDSM activity.
What a glorious space to exist in, where everything in one's mind drops away and only sensation remains. It's the ultimate space of relaxation and peace.
This space, devoid of time and social construct, is a state of the psyche entered through various mental activities and response pathways. The gateway to transcendence/out of body experience is connected to the reward system, pleasure and attentiveness. The physical circumstances that create the mind state include but not limited to:
Meditation
Sex - intimacy, reward, power exchange, sensory stimulation, association
Near death experience
Drugs
Attentiveness applies to meditation and sex, specifically BDSM.
Activities that have taken me to that mental plane have involved that consuming of my being - all attention is directed to the present experience.
Rope - The sensual feelings, single focus, being still, and holding position
Impact - extreme focus and overwhelming of senses results in body shut down - subspace (present only in mind, but also not present.)
Holding position - presenting, slave positions, furniture play - intense focus and determination to hold still. This is attentiveness to one important and challenging task - pride and when pleased rewarded with pleasure.
Meditation or mindfulness, depending on your own understood definitions, is practicing attentiveness by focusing on sensations, including visualisation - It is totally cerebral, a quieting of the mind, a stripping, to move freely and to transcend beyond thought - to just feel.
The ultimate pleasure zone and the practice of attentiveness - so many ways to explore and receive pleasure.
Devote yourself to something or someone worthy and find this peace in your mind. 😌