I walk through subconscious corridors
That seem as though they have been constructed from Gigger sketches
I can‘t go down further, I can’t move through the chaotic void life’s pulled me back up
My conscious mind is a place of unblance
I’m getting to know myself with a new skin.
I’ve shed the old skin I once called myself.
But I know there is darkness within that reads like the hunter in the dark.
With an outlet of poetry I try to express the changes my mind makes almost daily.
I can feel myself-changing I’m no longer regressing maybe it’s called maturing.
But there are times you see when a child in me runs out screaming
Making a mockery of the calm that surrounds me,
I know I will never be a shaman of the ethereal world but maybe I can be an explorer of the mind that makes me.
Somehow gain insight into the person I can be.
I’m not striving for perfection but attempting to right wrongs.
Wrongs created in periods of a strange neurosis that felt like sanity slipped
What remained was a weird alter ego that had no boundaries,
who could not sense differences in in morals or ethics.
Whose existence was designed in hedonistic blueprints,
constructed from a strange mix of chaos and fucked up intent.
My words might be vague and you might not understand me
But this is the closest you’ll get to seeing me without a mask on.
The person who’s talking has striped the façade and I thank you for listening.
I needed a moment to lay myself bare so people could see me with clarity.
I’m not yet done with black mirrors there are parts of myself that scare me.
I’ll try to understand these so that all of myself holistically is all understood by me.
When the tower is drawn and change next rips through the world I know.
I’ll cope with new insight so I don’t digress or regress
move forward without having to resort to extremes.
I’m striving for a life lived in balance where happiness is found in minute detail.
I know the Taoist philosophers would argue that releasing means missing but that won’t stop me looking.
My Passions unrelenting I found a new lease of life
a debt’s paid and now there is bliss.
the best I can hope for is to maintain this