something a little different now
as I find myself adrift
I am anchored only slightly
by the sweetest and softest kiss
a raging water pushes farther
headfirst in the abyss
tumbling to dawn's early light
far removed from bliss
lonely
so lonely
and left all on my own
you never understood
couldn't see me
refused to own
mind body soul
yours
but not desired
touched
or claimed
once again
barefoot and aimless
abandoned in the rain
buckets of tears add nothing
to nothing
when you're are no one
does it matter?
how you feel
or is it wasted effort
practice in futility
parry
advance
yield
force me back
beat me bloody
call me names
a slut
your whore
anything at all
to leave me writhing on the floor
"you nasty little bitch
remember this
next time
you whore"
I am throbbing
screaming
wailing
punish me
some other way
for this I cannot bear
I cannot handle
the endless dire dismay
Trembling
in fear
and shock
left staring at my shoes
Ending up here
Rather than on the news