Thoughts of the Phoenix

Thoughts from the mind of a simple woman

You don't just jump into this

7 months ago. September 29, 2023 at 4:39 PM

This is one of the better sites, but I'm still surprised at the number of messages I've received; from both Doms and subs who seem to just to want to jump right into a dynamic or even just play, without getting to know each other. That has got to be the most foolish thing I've encountered. This is not something you just jump into, even if it's just play. You have to trust each other. That isn't developed overnight. It takes time. Conversation. If you're just an insta-dom or insta-sub, then you will never find a truly fulfilling dynamic. Of course if you are just an insta, then I doubt you really care.

Irish123(dom male) - Well said! Frenzy, whether Dom or sub, is a real thing. Especially for those totally new. They don't take the time to consider the negative side and think its all sunshine and roses.

7 months ago

PhoenixQueen(dom female) - It's just so frustrating. It's like, come on use your brain! If you have one lol.

7 months ago

Irish123(dom male) - Well, I feel like I am in an unusual i not unique situation with my sub. She is my wife also. When I came out of the kink closet to her and she agreed to be my sub, I was wanting to do all the things. I was given bad advice from so called leaders, and almost ruined the dynamic and the marriage. I slowed down and realized BDSM and our dynamic wasn't going anywhere, so I was able to do real research and learn from experiences.

7 months ago

PhoenixQueen(dom female) - Your situation is different. You already knew and trusted each other.

7 months ago

Irish123(dom male) - I know but I can only share my thoughts from my experience. I still think people that give into submitting or Doming right off the bat are looking for a quick fix, are new, or just read the dreaded book.

7 months ago

PhoenixQueen(dom female) - that's exactly my point lol. and it's dangerous. why is it that every blog post i've written people seem to completely miss the point?

7 months ago

Purĕ(sub female){♥︎loved} - I love those "Doms" which jump right into it. Asking for offsite Apps to have a call to play. It has nothing to do with a Dynamic. It's just a kinky version of phonesex. boring.

Trust, Connection and to know the other person makes it intense. Online as well as Reallife

7 months ago

PhoenixQueen(dom female) - You still have to be able to trust each other. Dynamic or not, it's foolish to just jump right into something without knowing for sure if you can trust each other.

7 months ago

Purĕ(sub female){♥︎loved} - totally agree.

7 months ago

PhoenixQueen(dom female) - Omgs, I just realized your first comment was said in sarcasm 😂

7 months ago

AdamDragon(dom male) - Very well said.

7 months ago

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PhoenixQueen​(dom female)

Thoughts of the Phoenix

You don't just jump into this

PhoenixQueen(dom female)