The Culture that has been here all the time

I have had potential in science, art, and music, but I would have done much better if I had my bipolar condition treated in the past, not this late in life. I have always had a consort to inspire and guide me, nevertheless. My current wife was fabulous, but dementia has destroyed our relationship. I abandoned creativity and a social life to care for her. I hope one day to have a muse to revive the creative spirit within me.

So I will be 78 in a couple of weeks. I asked myself what is different. Nothing. My wife is 70 and very ill, and I will seem to be in pretty good health, having defeated challenges years ago.

So I have made a birthday resolution: I no longer trust women under the age of 55.

I have set a goal for myself to learn every erogenous zone a woman has and stimulate them in every way agreeable to them. The only drawback? The most recent FWB is long gone, and though she was invaluable in my quest, when she moved on, she left me with an incomplete study. Will I ever pick up where I left off? No one knows, but I am optimistic (I think).

I had a dream last night about an adventurous woman who rang my doorbell and invited herself inside. We talked about a number of things to pass the time. After I fed my ill wife and got her into bed, I thought the woman would leave.

She led me up to the master bedroom and we began to embrace and kiss. She teased me for what seemed to be a long time, and when I couldn't take it anymore, I took off my clothes, and as I removed what she still had on, I kissed her whole body. Every time her pussy got soaking wet, she put it in my face and told me to lick up all the juice. I gladly did. When we playfully engaged in a 69, I licked and sucked on her clit as she moaned for a long time, then blurted out fuck me, fuck me. I was about to when my cat interrupted because it was time to get up and feed him.

I forgave my cat because he can't understand my predicament anyway.

I am still consumed by my caregiving for my wife, but she is either in a wheelchair or on the sofa bed. Wake her, prepare food, feed her, change her, and get her back on the sofa bed. Endless cycle that I keep doing because I love her. I can not tell if she loves me or not, however.

Seeking help can be overwhelming, and changes to healthcare in this country make it even more complicated. Even my Veterans' Benefits seem to be under threat, so when the time comes, I do not believe there is any hope for my old-age care.

I will be 78 in two weeks. Who wants an old man on their hands anyway?

Believe it or not, I am still able to care for my wife, our home, and our cat and dog, but joy has all but ebbed away completely.

Having kinky desires and a strong libido is a curse since I do not have any chance for a social life. No soothing touch. No warm embrace. No sexual release or satisfaction. (To masturbate is a hollow shadow for real intimacy I hate it)

I like the dialogue in the British TV shows that I watch over and over, when a character goes out looking for something and returns, and when asked, did he or she have success, and they respond, "No joy" when they return without success. pixabay.com

I am suspending my blog because of a lack of interest.

Seems never to tire of enjoying looking at a woman's body - the women who want men to admire their body, that is. There is no shortage of consenting women, and I love it. The only issue I have is that I lack a FWB for these days, as my wife is sexually non-responsive. I live like I did when I was a young man before I had a lover: Look but don't touch.

I say, "It is better to be a sub to a Mistress than a Dom of no woman."

Millie sat in the coffee shop alone, staring into her cup, thinking it was only six weeks ago she was there with her now diseased husband, enjoying the time together. She thought Now I am sixty-five and alone, and I don’t like it at all. She glanced at another table where a man sat reading a newspaper with his cup of coffee.
Bob was seventy-four, and it had been a year since his wife had passed away. His nights have been lonely, and he didn’t like it. He has binged on all his favorite movies and television programs, and he was about to begin watching them again.

Millie and Bob enjoyed extraordinary sex lives with their now-gone spouses, and of all the things that made getting older difficult, it was adjusting to the absence of intimacy.

Just as the waitress handed Bob his receipt, he noticed Millie. She was looking right at him with her beautiful blue eyes, and it was like an electric shock for Bob. He was about to leave, but Millie's eyes locked onto his Hazel eyes, and he felt compelled to walk over to her.

“Hello, my name is Bob. I was intrigued by the look in your eyes.”

“Hi, my name is Millie. I noticed you were sitting alone and wondered if you always came here alone.”

“Pleased to meet you, Millie. Yes, my wife passed last year, and I developed the habit of starting my day here instead of mopping around the house.”

“Well, Bob, my husband passed only a little more than a month ago after a long illness, and we used to come here in better days.”

They seemed to find each other attractive, and after a short time of small talk, Bob said, “Millie, would you join me for a walk? It is such a nice day!”

The new couple strolled along the main street in town, window shopping as they walked. After an hour, they arrived at a small park and found a bench they liked, so they sat down for a conversation. It seemed as if they had known each other for a long time, and passersby would think they were a couple enjoying their golden years.

“Millie, I sure enjoyed your company.”

Taking Bob’s hand in hers, Millie said, “Bob, my apartment is only two blocks away. Would you like to come with me? I will make us a nice lunch, and we can relax afterward.”

Millie and Bob got up from the bench as he said Great and they walked hand in hand to her apartment.

The apartment was on the ground level of a reasonably new brick building. When they were inside, Bob noted it was nicely kept. Inside her apartment, it was modern with all the conveniences.

“Millie, have you lived here long?”

“No, I sold the house when my husband's illness became so severe I had to admit him into a care facility. The bill was high. I paid what I could, and after adjusting financially, I found this place.”

Bob touched Millie’s shoulder. She welcomed the show of affection and hugged him. The hug gradually became an embrace, and then they kissed. The couple eased over to the couch and kissed, and as they did, the kisses became more passionate. Bob began to slip his hands under Millie’s blouse and fondled he breasts. She effortlessly clipped her bra while he unbuttoned her blouse.
Her breasts were beautiful and not at all like those of a woman in her sixties. Her rose colored nipples perked up to his touch and them he gently sucked on each breast.
“Which one is the most sensitive, Millie?”
“My right one go easy on that one and suck harder on my left nipple.”
As he played, licked and sucked her breasts Millie undid his belt and unzipped his pants. She had no trouble getting his cock to the open aid because his boxer shorts were loose. He moaned has she felt his ball and cock and moaned more pronounced when she kissed the tip. Already, a trickle of pre-cum was at the tip, and she licked it.
“Mmmmmm, you taste and smell good, Bob.”
As she sucked on his cock she helped him slide off his clothes. He has already put a finger in her pussy and was amazed in how wet it was. He worked on it and put two fingers inside her and with another circle\d he anus. She was getting wetter by the second he pulled off he pants and panties and saw a beautiful well groomed pussy with slightly graying hair. Instinctively, his mouth was exploring her whole crotch.
Both were moaning.
Bob said, “I am going to drink all you pussy Juices Millie they taste so good.”
She said, “leave some so your cock will slip in an out with ease.”
In a flask his cock was inside her. It felt so good that he moaned loudly.
She enjoyed the penetration and screamed “Fuck Me; Fuck; Me.”
They both came together, and then their bodies went limp. They gently kissed and fondled each other for about an hour. And then the passion returned, and they began to make love all over again.

You may not agree with me because my wife is alive and under my care entirely. She has ADA diagnosis, similar to Bruce Willis's, since 2017. Over the last month, her care has become much more challenging, but I will continue to do so. 

Awkward life for me. Forty years married, and my wife's disease has rendered her asexual. During the past four years, without her being able to have sex, I had a FWB for a short time. All went well for the most part, but she hasn't been here for over a year now, and even at my age, my libido is strong, and I would enjoy KINKY sex. Even experiment with new things.

Caregiving has kept me at home, without social opportunities to meet potential partners. Perhaps if I found a way to participate in meetups, I could overcome this limitation.

Maybe I will see if I can get enough money to hire an aide in the evening when an event near me is scheduled.

"Each Man Should" have a mistress at some time in his life. 

We males start in our sexual awakening flush with hormones and an almost uncontrollable urge to have sex with every attractive woman we meet. The unwritten code is to be satisfied as often as possible. The majority of us learn how to moderate this natural desire to conform to societal norms.

Then, one day, sometime soon, or sometimes later, we feel emotions creep in, and we either want a relationship or already have one. We fall in love. 

If our lover isn't happy, we do the responsible thing: ask her why and what we can do to be a better partner.

This is the point when having a mistress who can teach you how to make love to a woman is a good option. Set your ego aside and admit you are not thoroughly experienced or knowledgeable enough concerning sex and could learn something. You can learn a great deal from most women, but a woman who is exceptionally knowledgeable and experienced in this matter is the best option.

I am in my late seventies, and over the past year, I have learned more than I expected. I only wish I had learned some things about love-making sooner.

pixabay.com