Finally.
It didn’t happen all at once. It wasn’t a single moment, but a series of them, each one loosening something I had held too tightly. A slow pull, a steady unravel, piece by piece over days, until today. Until now.
I felt it break open inside me, not with force, but with inevitability. The weight of her words, the reality of her claim, the truth of where I stand, it settled into me, and I had no choice but to feel it. No choice but to surrender completely.
And so I did. I let it go. Finally.
I unraveled. I shook. I burned. I came apart and let it happen, let it take me, let it hold me in a space. The weight of it crashed through me, leaving me trembling, breathless, stripped bare in ways I can’t yet explain. I cried, actually cried. Emotionally, I felt this release deeply, but also physically, the trembling, the ache in my chest, the way my heart pounded before it finally settled. Before I grasped for her in the chain, before I anchored.
And then she left me to sit in it. To absorb it. To feel it fully without rushing to fix or contain it. Without softening the edges or numbing the intensity. She gave me space to exist in the rawness of it, and I am grateful for that. So very grateful to have done this for her, for me.
And I know this wasn’t an accident. She intended this. Even in her absence, she was shaping me, leading me through this unraveling, guiding me toward something I needed to feel. She knew. She always knows.
Now, I lay in bed, mind quiet but exhausted, my body spent from emotions I didn’t know I was capable of feeling this deeply. But there is peace in it. A stillness in the aftermath. I trust she will reach me soon. I wait patiently. I touch the chain.
How perfect it feels to feel...nothing and to just wait. Like this is my purpose. With nothing to hold and just simply being.
And I know, when she beckons, I will rise. I will answer as hers.
Because I am hers. And I am ready.