🏍️ 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐧𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐥 & 𝐁𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐰 🎤

                💋🤯 📚 𝐇𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐖𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐤𝐚𝐠𝐞™ – 𝐕𝐨𝐥𝐮𝐦𝐞 𝟏👠🤯

                         📖 9 Chapters • Posted over 3 Days • Buckle Up 🚬🐾

Bullet: “Somebody better explain why this man thinks three days of chaos is a good idea…” 🙄💋

Animal: “Because, baby, once I get started I don’t stop till the whole house is wrecked. You wanted a story? You’re gettin’ the saga.” 😏👊

Bullet: “Saga? More like wreckage therapy. Folks, he drags me into this every damn time, and you wonder why Bunny keeps stealing credit cards…” 🐶💳

Animal: “Hey, don’t blame Bunny. Chaos is the one teaching him tricks. You? You’re just guilty of lettin’ it happen.” 🍑🔥

Bullet: “Oops… busted.” 😳🙈

Animal (to everyone): “So here it is, folks — three days, nine chapters, one madhouse. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” 😎💥

Animal ,And they wonder why I'm a madman this is what I live with everyday

A comedic-erotic disaster brought to you by Animal & Bullet, featuring Chaos, And a

German Shepherd named "Bunnie (Don't laugh) with poor impulse control, and a credit card that should've been hidden better.

👠🏍️🪢𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 1 𝑭𝒐𝒍𝒌𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒚 𝒍𝒊𝒇𝒆🪢🏍️👠

So, I come home yesterday, right?
The place is quiet. Too quiet.
Chaos is giggling. Bullet’s grinning.

And the damn dog is looking at me like he just closed a mortgage in my name.
Turns out, someone got into my wallet — again.
A package shows up addressed to “Big Daddy Woof” and inside?
One vibrating egg with Bluetooth sync

A A latex gimp mask shaped like a Doberman head

And a note that says: “Don’t forget to stretch. ?￢ﾀﾝ

Let me be crystal clear:

I DID NOT ORDER THIS.

I have a theory, though.

See… Chaos and Bullet were trying to teach the dog to do online checkouts as a joke.
Now he has an OnlyFans page and a 12K following.

They call him "@GawdOnAllFours
.
And somehow, this mutt’s buying toys, getting compliments, and stealing my Harley one ride at a time.

Chapter Two: The Girls Gone Rogue

Bullet had the nerve to tiptoe barefoot 🦶 out the front door with my leather vest tied around her waist like it was some kind of sexed-up superhero cape 🦸‍♀️.
Chaos followed close behind, wearing mirrored aviators 🕶️ and dragging a duffel bag that clanked like it was full of sex toys and felony charges 🔥.

They wheeled the Harley out quiet as ghosts 👻. Didn’t even start it in the driveway. They pushed that beast two blocks down before Bullet hopped on and fired it up like she was shot out of a goddamn cannon 💥.

By the time I checked the security cam footage 📹, they were already halfway to the diner—Bullet riding like she was born on chrome 🏍️, and Chaos standing up on the back pegs like some kind of circus brat with a death wish 🎪.
And what did they do next? They didn’t rob a bank 💰. They didn’t set anything on fire 🔥. Nope. They rolled into a college bar 🍹, ordered mimosas, and told everyone inside they were married to an ex-Dom with a dog that does online shopping 🐶💳.
Chaos tipped the bartender in quarters 🪙. Bullet gave out relationship advice 💋 like she had a license. And by the time they left, three waitresses had offered to join the cult.
It was only 9:17 a.m. ⏰
And I was still standing in my damn boxers. 🩲

"Chapter Three: The Dog Buys Lube" (‿!‿) (‿|‿) ( ㅅ ) 🧴🛢️

Back home, my German Shepherd—Bunny 🐾 (yes Bunny, don’t judge)—had clearly discovered the autofill function on Chrome 💻.
Because I walked into the kitchen to find:
👉 14 open tabs.
👉 A box of overnight delivery items 📦 labeled “Discreet Packaging” sitting by the front door.
👉 And the cheerful little bastard pawing through a pile of stuff that should require a signed affidavit and adult supervision 😳.

He’d ordered:

Two bottles of organic lube (mint-flavored) 🌿

• 𝟏-𝟓𝟓 𝐠𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐧 𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐦 𝐨𝐟 𝐋𝐮𝐛𝐞 𝕃𝕚𝕧𝕖𝕣 𝕗𝕒𝕧𝕠𝕣𝕖𝕕
  A vibrating feather duster (why??) 🪶
  A full set of latex leggings in assorted sizes 🖤
  And a collapsible sex swing (deluxe edition) 🪂🔥
  There was also a pink leather collar that read “Daddy’s Goodest Boy” 🐕💖 and I’m not gonna lie… part of me was impressed.

He had clearly raided the girls’ wishlists and optimized for chaos 😈.

I opened my email 📧 and saw the shipping conf

irmations, reviews, and something labeled “Doggie Rewards Program.”
He’d also left a review: “Fits snug. Would chew again.” 

✨🔥 ~ House of Wreckage ~ 🔥✨
📖 Part 2 & Part 3 • Coming Soon • The chaos never sleeps 🐾💳

Bullet: “You think Chapter One was bad? Wait till they see what Bunny ordered…” 🙈📦

Animal: “And don’t forget you sneakin’ out with Chaos like it’s some Harley heist. Folks, she’s out here writing felony fanfiction with my leather vest.” 😏🏍️

Bullet: “Oops. Busted again. 😳💋”

Animal (to everyone): “Two more parts dropping soon. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Wreckage is a lifestyle.” 👊🔥

 A&B