Divine Feminine and The Temple of Asherah

“When it's cold outside who are you holding?”

- Bobby Womack

You Can’t Experience Joy Without Risk

There’s no shame in admitting “I” suffer from depression. 🧠. And NO, I don’t need a cookie 🍪 or a special congratulations.  

If you live long enough, you’ll find out everyone’s got something they carry—a shadow that chases them when the lights go down. I’ve learned that shame thrives in silence, and that trauma isn’t a weakness. It’s just a chapter. We all have one.

Growing up, my parents told me it wasn’t real. “It’s all in your head,” they’d say, as if your mind wasn’t part of your body. But even as a kid, I knew: If you can break your elbow, you can break your mind. Bones mend, but when your spirit snaps, you move different. You see the world with a limp.

But here’s what depression doesn’t want you to know:

You can still take chances.

You can still feel.

💳 The Real Cost of Playing It Safe

Let’s talk about risk. About loneliness. About pain.

You don’t dodge heartbreak by never loving. (REPEAT:  You don’t dodge heartbreaks by never loving).

You just trade it for a different kind of ache—the ache of what could have been. I get why people play it safe. It feels logical: “If I don’t reach, I can’t fall.” But what nobody tells you is that standing still is its own kind of falling.

You don’t see it until you’re older, looking back at all the things you didn’t do, wishing you had one more shot to fuck it all up and start over.

 We Crave to Be Felt  ❤️‍🩹

“We crave to be spanked for the same reason we crave to be held—because being felt is proof we exist, and being marked is proof we belong.”

It’s not about pain or pleasure. It’s about proof of life. The body and the mind—they’re just instruments. If you deaden yourself to hurt, you lose the ability to taste joy. You can’t mute the lows and expect to hear the highs. You either risk it all, or you risk feeling nothing.

Depression lies and says it’s safer to stay numb. But numbness is just loneliness with the lights off.

The Truth About Hurt ❤️‍🩹

Here’s the real question:

“Is the hurt more devastating than the possibility?”

No.🛑

Not unless you make it so.

Pain is the tuition you pay for being alive. Joy is the interest you collect if you stick around for the payout.

You can survive the heartbreak. But you can’t outrun regret.

Regret is what comes for you at 2AM, whispering about the chances you didn’t take, the bodies you never held, the love you left unread. You can’t out-stoic regret. You can’t drink it away. The only cure is living fully, with all the risk, all the heat, and all the mess that comes with it.

⏳ So, If You Think You’re Lonely Now…

It’s because you’re waiting for something safe.

But safe is not what saves you.

Connection is a bloodsport. It’s a leap off the edge and hoping someone meets you on the way down. You will be bruised. You will get burned. But you’ll feel. And that’s proof you’re still here, still fighting, still alive.

If you think you’re lonely now, imagine how lonely you’ll feel if you never let anyone in—if you never let yourself want.

Take the Risk

You’re not missing anything, except the chance to live before you die.

So take the risk. Get hurt. Get marked. Cry. Rage. Laugh.

But above all, feel—because joy, pain, and love are all part of the same wild, beautiful, human ride.

If you’re still breathing, it’s not too late to want more.

So be bold. Take the chance. Risk the pain. Because the only way to win this game is to play it—body, mind, and soul.

And that’s me being honest, because you demand it and you deserve it. Always.

—Alex