I think in another life my name would be MOANA.
NOPE, this is not a sex thing giving me a new nickname because of moaning 😂😂😂🙈🙈🙊🙊 oh my gosh...ha!
now that I have cleared that up, 😂, back to why I am Moana. Moana's safe place, her calm, that ongoing pull calls her to the water. She even sings about it...
"But I come back to the water, no matter how hard I try..."
yep. That is me. 100%.
2:30am- I am listening to the ocean waves. If I take a deep breath and close my eyes I can almost feel the waves washing over me. (Talk about a perfect example of power exchange! Mmmm yes please!) Oh how I wish I could push the pause button on the rest of the world right now....areas of growth bring out the "best" of my insecurities. That is where I have spent a great deal of time most recently.
Truthfully, I feel like this would be a more accurate song when it comes to my feelings and insecurities at the moment:
My insecurities really have been getting the best of me recently. I repeat truths, facts that I know to be true, and cling to them like a lifeline. Sometimes it helps. Sometimes it does not. Sometimes I turn things around so much in my head that the very things that are meant to be grounding and freeing are actually really causing more anxiety. And then I operate in and from a state of overwhelm. Maybe some day I will rest in those anchor points and people...someday.
Somewhere between a Disney Princess and Blue October you will find me....confident, fun, sassy, playful, determined, outgoing, and yes, even sparkling in my insecurities. You see, in order to find the diamond you have to dig deep and go through the fires to get to it. :)
Now, earlier I said if I close my eyes I could ALMOST feel the waves washing over me.
Well... it's hard to be near the ocean when I am sitting in cold Snowhio. I can go to Lake Erie, and do so often to watch the waves, but not usually so early in the morning :)
No, no...the waves I am listening to are on the Baby Sleep App. (I work overnight as a postpartum doula taking care of babies)
You see, the waves are simply white noise.....its all about the perspective.