Name' sake

Ive got a ditch to dig,

and one to fill.

Ive got to stop the bleeding,

and blood to spill.

The cask of 43 has run a-ground,

And futures future left the sound.

I have tools and spools,

Fooled

I can build destruction!

Witch winch has drawn the corruption.

Havoc's time has come,

Like an idiopathic maelstrom.

Watch,

Watch out - 

Ive come undone . . . 

(As always, this is not to, at, because of,  about anyone - just freestyle poetry)

my latest piece - 100% hand made sterling silver,  except the lobster clasp itself.

An homage to my wing'ed friends

Waiting for the microwave to ding . . . .

Then I realized I never hit start ?

Searching for my phone . . . And the person on the other end says "where were you last using it?"

Placing a bet you cant back up

Leave or stay? 

This is the age old question that has plagued mankind for millennia. 

They were calling for snow yesterday - I didnt look out the window . . . .

So it didnt snow! ?

Or did it?    ? 

Today I saw 2 inch tall Easter lillies in my yard - in January??

Last year I had fireflies in April

"Times they are a changin"

While enjoying your morning tea, gazing out the window at your 'spansive front yard, you witness a massive unkindness - what would you do? What would you do if you saw a murder?

If you found out you had  "acute post-prandial hypersomnia"  would you -

A - seek medical attention immediately 

B - start getting your final affairs in order

C - lay down and hold still until it passes

D - set your neighbors house on fire

You have been exposed to a common chemical,  known as dihydrogen monoxide,  or 'DHMO' , what would be the first thing you would do?

(See above options list. ?)

(Research conducted by award-winning U.S. scientist Nathan Zohner concluded that roughly 86 percent of the population supports a ban on dihydrogen monoxide. Although his results are preliminary, Zohner believes people need to pay closer attention to the information presented to them regarding Dihydrogen Monoxide. He adds that if more people knew the truth about DHMO then studies like the one he conducted would not be necessary) (DHMO.org)

?

For those who remember when this song came out - seems like yesterday,  doesn't it?

"To the beautiful and the wise, the mirror always lies"

Pay attention youth of today, for you are the future of tomorrow and one day your own yesterday.

It has been brought to my attention that it feels "weird" to browse through my old blogs. Like digging through someone's personal belongings. 

Im not sure why that is. If you want to know me, by all means, please browse through my blogs - thats why they are still public.

 I put out there my heart and soul - if you feel so inspired, reach out to me.

?

Ive been researching some analytics to help give advice to a friend who wants to launch a youtube channel.

According to 'infidigit' for the year 2021, the second highest searched topic in the US was ASMR, (second only to pewdiepie ?). And the third highest for world searches, (also second to pewdiepie ?).

Personally,  I dont get it. 

I mean, stop it already, will ya! Those sounds are irritating,  lol

Then I thought . . . . ?

What about in the kink world?

So I got to thinking . . . . 

What exactly are the benefits of being a member of a bdsm site? A "kink" site, if you will.

(Ms V, please allow me a moment of inspirational transgression ?)

Is it the comradery? Seeking the "like minded"? 

Is it for education on the subject?

Perhaps a jolly get off on the unsuspecting?

Hopes for nude pics.

I like to do things in the bedroom that are "out of the ordinary"

Nice

So why join a website that promotes such behavior?

Heres my philosophy on the subject -

People are horny and bored.

?

Joyce was in shock, utter disbelief.  There had to be some other explanation,  there had to be! 

'Video foolery? A trick?' 

re·al·i·ty
/rēˈalədē/
Learn to pronounce
See definitions in:
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Philosophy
noun
1.
the world or the state of things as they actually exist, as opposed to an idealistic or notional idea of them.
"he refuses to face reality"

The video showed Renee as you would expect, someone having a bad dream - night terrors.

Her head slammed unnaturally to the right, then left - she flipped on her stomach and writhed in pain. Gripping desperately at the sheets above her head. 

Alone.

But then . . . . Welts appeared. 

"I told you!"

"Sshhh sshh" Joyce waved her to wait and backed up the video a couple minutes and watched again.

She held her hand to her mouth and was silent, staring in disbelief.

"You have to . . . I mean . . . this is . . . this is . . ."

"You can't tell anyone, please Joyce, I mean it"

"Honey" she chuckled a bit "who would believe us?"

She backed up the video and watched again.

"Because you . . ."

"Yes, he told me I wasnt allowed"

Renee just watched patiently as Joyce tried to wrap her head around this.

Joyce sat back and took a calming deep breath . . . Then another

"Well then . . ."

"You really should have that eye looked at sweetheart "

"Its fine, im not trying to start a domestic violence investigation"

"Ah, right . . right"

"How can . . . I mean . . . How is this possible??"

Joyce watched the video one more time.

"What are you going to do?"

"Not masturbate, thats for sure"

They both laughed. . . Cut short by the realization. 

"And he has come to you every night?"

"Yes, I go to bed expecting him."  "Joyce . . . "  she paused  "I feel like . . . ."

"Its ok, go on "

"I feel like . . . im falling in love with him"

"Come on now Renee, you're talking like hes . . ."

She stopped . . .

"Like he's what? Real?"

"You're talking about falling in love with a dream!"

"You see the marks Joyce, you saw the video"

Time passed, he continued to visit her nightly. Sometimes giving her tasks to complete, telling her what to wear, or not wear. Sometimes egding her almost to her breaking point. Sometimes punishing her.

But always there.

Friday  4:30pm

"Joyce, I want to join him"

Joyce chuckled at the thought, but her smile quickly faded when she saw Renee's completely serious expression.

"Join him??"

"How?"

Renee just stared

"Oh come on! You cant be serious!"

A tear slipped down Renee's cheek

"Honey, you cant be serious! You're talking about . . . "

"I want to join him"

Joyce closed her practice that spring and moved to France.

She never spoke of her time with Renee (or him) to anyone.

Reality?

~fin

"Did you call the police?" 

"Joyce!  come on, call the police on who? The boogie man?"

"Sweetheart,  your lip is split and you have clear finger marks on your neck - dreams dont do that!"

Renee began to sob. 

"You are sure no one was there?"

"Yes Joyce, im positive, I swear to you, no one was in my room!" 

Joyce scribbled a few notes, her mind reached for possibilities  - 'protecting her abuser? . . . But then why come to me for help? Why make up this "only in my dreams" story?' She had known Renee for awhile now, she had been coming to see her regularly since she lost her mother. Always well grounded in reality.

"I want to try something,  ok?" 

"Anything!"

"I want you to set up a camera in your room"

He was gentle with her that night, more gentle than he had ever been. Caressing her soft skin, teasing . . . tracing every curve  -  bringing her closer and closer. Her body was on fire. Her arms pinned above, her legs spred wide . . . . She still couldnt move, but she did not want to be free from him. His fingers knew exactly what to do, he was inside her. Not physically,  no - like part of her. He danced her like a puppeteer,  pulled on her, brought her right to the edge . . . .repeatedly. "please" she begged without a voice, "please" . . . . her hips heaving, longing for release.

"Dont touch"  came the disembodied whisper to her ear, a gentle kiss . . . And he was gone.

She woke breathing heavily,  confused. She didnt startle awake - it was more like, slipped out of sleep quickly. A smooth transition. She became aware of the ache . . . "Dont touch" . . . .

"Joyce, this is too embarrassing"

"Come on, lets see"

The video showed Renee as she descibed, seemingly pinned to the bed, but also, yes - alone in the room.

"This does not explain how you got a split lip and marks on your neck, all I see is someone having a wet dream" Joyce stated with a touch of sarcasm in her voice.

"Theres something I didnt tell you"

She gave her a 'go on' look over her glasses

"He was angry that day . . . I mean, I made him angry"

"Well, I guess we'll just have to piss him off again, wont we?" She tossed her glasses on the desk, clearly getting frustrated. 

"You dont believe me!" Tears welled in her eyes.

"Look Renee, Ive known you and your family for a long time,  you are like a daughter to me - but come on, whats really going on?"

The tears came.

"You can tell me sweetheart,  its ok".

"I AM telling you Joyce!" She snapped, "I swear on my life, im telling you the truth!"

Joyce leaned back and took a deep breath.

"How did you anger him?"

"I masturbated"

She jotted a few more notes

"And?"

"He told me I wasnt to do that"

A few awkward moments passed

"I want to send you over to . . ."

"Im not going to see anyone Joyce!" She interrupted "I came to you with this out of desparation, you think I dont know how goddamn crazy this sounds!"

Her tears flowing now

"Ok, ok, calm down" she walked around the desk and handed her the tissue box, and gave her a quick hug.

They both took a moment to think, reasses the situation. 

"What if you pissed him off again?"

"Joyce!"

"Well, I mean . . . "

Joyce worked to hide the grin when she saw Renees eyebrow go up in consideration of the idea.

End of part 4