He arrived about a quarter after 7. I was in my normal position at the top of the stairs.
He came up the stairs and stepped past me, I kept my eyes focused on the ground.
I felt his hand grip my arm and he pulled me to my feet, covered my body with a throw, led me to the couch, then pulled my arm so I would sit.
He leaned over me and removed the day collar that I was still wearing from the night before.
I expected him to put my other collar on, but he did not.
He pulled the ottoman in front of the couch and sat in front of me.
He finally spoke, he told me to speak freely, but to please wait until he was done.
He went on to accuse me of purposely breaking the rules in attempt to provoke a punishment out of him. He explained that he was my husband first and foremost and that making him worry was not appropriate as a slave or a wife.
He explained the rules I had broke as his slave, but how the promises I had broke as his wife were much more hurtful.
He told me how he had spent the night worrying about me and couldn’t believe I had the horrible judgment to get in the car with a stranger as intoxicated as I was.
I let him finish, I told him that he was right and that I was sorry, but corrected him on his thoughts that I would put him through that in an attempt to get a punishment out of him.
He explained how my collar was supposed to signify my service to him and in order for him to truly own me he needed to be able to trust me to keep myself safe and that if I couldn’t do that then he couldn’t trust himself, and that I would not be getting it back until the trust was there again.
He told me how he had spent the night thinking of horrible punishments for me, how he had planned on tying me to the bed and whipping me, but then figured I would just be getting what I wanted.
He told me how he had spent the day online trying to come up with the perfect punishment for me but none seemed to fit.
He then told me that it will be my responsibility to come up with punishment, and that it is to be a true punishment.
Until I have come up with and followed through on this punishment I will not serve him in any way. I’m to wear clothes, sleep in my bed, eat at the table, everything is off.
He said he was tired and needed to get some sleep and headed up stairs to shower. I was sitting on the edge of the bed when he came out and took my bed and carried it to the spare room( it honestly broke my heart a bit).
He’s asleep now and I’m up trying to think, I really thought he would come home, punish me and we would go back to how we were.
I think he is being a bit extreme, I was late, but only a couple hours. I know he worried during that time and I am very sorry for that, but to completely loose trust in me seems like punishment enough.
I can think of a million punishments, but I need something to show exactly how sorry I am, how much I want to continue with our journey and get my collar back.
The idea of going up to my room and crawling in to my bed seems wrong to me now.
I need to find a way to fix this
