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Discommbobulated

As I mentally toy with this side of me I wonder should I ask for more? What is too much... or are my desires not enough. Exploring, wanting, fearing. Sweet pain I breath for. I close the door reluctantly until the key is to heavy to carry. Here I am. Waiting.... the delicious strappings against my skin. Here is my place.
5 years ago. June 14, 2019 at 5:12 AM

Thursday night. Close to my most pleasurable days off of the week. Friday, Saturday, Sunday.... I think there was a song that lalalalad about the weekend? If you remember the song  please refresh my memory. Anywho, the workday was long. Listening to cases, developing treatment plans, faxing reports, overseeing a plethora of staff, and putting out fires with a therapeutic hose can be exhausting. Dinner was basic. Four small golden potatoes, five green asparagus , three thinly slices of beef, and a partridge in a  pear tree. Oh my! I’m way to tired.... after watching the Golden State Warriors play their asses off. I begin to think about the basics. The basic food I eat. The basic lives people live and the basic needs each one of us desire. Food, shelter, love, and what else do we need? Some individuals need expensive clothes. Others need money, booshie  trips, or maybe the latest pair of red bottom heels that they believe will fulfill their basic needs. Nonetheless. The word basic can be equivalent to the word “vanilla” as defined in the sex world as plain old missionary style sex or basic can be interpreted as the basic needs of a BDSM lifestyler filled with deviant yet acceptable  sexual needs, desires, consensual control, mutual trust, submissiveness, and/or painful bliss. As all these basic interpretations run rampant in my head, I think about my own definition of basic desires. Submissiveness, allowing oneself to be free, being tied up, bondage, wonderful freedom, and sexual pain that is shared with a a trusting individual who is confident, firm yet gentle, a person that knows what I need and desires the same. For a moment I close my eyes and envision my basic yet most natural desires. My breathing becomes labored and for a moment I allow myself to indulge into my sexual BDSM fantasies but my thoughts are interrupted by the voice of the 10 o’clock newscaster on channel ten. Dammit. The Thursday news report is so basic and it’s Thursday. Goodnight! 


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