Enter the Void

Nothing brings a session from a low to a high like laughter. 

Joking around with Wolfy after I've been stroking him and going down on him, giggling after we've cum and we're in the middle of post-sex snuggles, tickling and mleming (a silly thing we do that involves tiny licks and making that sound), old inside jokes... 

Those moments, when you can be silly with your partner, despite still having them inside you/being inside them, or still covered in sweat, or even in the middle of things... those moments are the best, in my opinion at least. 

I was always awkward and nervous with joking around during things, when Wolfy and I would meet up for a week or two here and there (I was a virgin when we started dating). I didnt understand how something so "serious" (thanks, mom and dad, for instilling nerves and fear into me -.-) could be better with laughter. But now, I love it <3 

Wishing we weren't out til God-awful hours every night right now, cause I want a round 2 >.> 

Been having a rough time lately... rough enough that I'm starting to contemplate seeing someone to talk to about it, despite my distaste of therapy/councelling, because of bad past experiences. 

I ended up hurting Wolfy twice between last night and this morning... not intentionally, but I did some stupid things that resulted in some arguing and hurt feelings. Everything is fine now, but still, I regret deeply that I hurt him and wish I could take it back. 

But my cute, sweet, loveable wolf is such a love, that despite /him/ being the one hurt, he went out of his way to bring these to me at work, so he could brighten/my/ day: 

It was such a sweet, unexpected surprise... I almost wanted to cry in the middle of the lunch rush Haha.

So many times, he does things so sweet, unexpected, and wonderful things. I find myself constantly amazed by the amount of love this man has in his body... I'm so blessed. <3

I love you Wolfy. My sweet mate <3 

I've worked here for almost a year and a half. You've only been here for 3 months.

I have expertly passed all exams, trainings, tests. You havent even taken them all yet. 

I have some of the fastest times in my store, on all positions. And yet, until now because it's the game you're playing, I dont brag about it. I just do my damn job. 

Just because you're training to become a supervisor, doesnt mean you know better. Guess what? I'm being trained for it too. Just not officially because there are no slots open. But you didnt know that, did you? Because you dont frigging need to. 

You cant even handle more than one sandwich at a time. I stack the grill with 5+ and barely slow. 

You wanna play the one-up game? I'll play. And you won't like it when I start, because I can actually back up my claims. Dont talk shit if you cant support it. 

If your store was so good... why were you sent here to train? 

If your store is so good... why do they never get higher than an 80 on inspections, while we consisitantly get the highest score of 100?

If your store is so good, and "makes so much more" (I've seen your numbers... no, you dont), why couldnt you keep up on even our slowest days? 

Your store is bigger, yes. But it isnt better. The scores alone prove that. Your actions vs ours back it up. 

I know what I'm doing. Shut up, stop incorrectly telling me what to do, and let me do my job so I can fix the shitty times you're making. Customers shouldn't have to wait 5+ minutes for a damn cheesesteak. 

Its not a hard job. Get your shit together before you try to act all high and mighty. 

I cant fucking stand one-uppers. I'm doing so well at biting my lip, but I've almost bitten it off... 1400 cant come fast enough. I cant wait til she leaves. 

It's crazy to me, how you know all the right ways to get my engine roaring. 

Snuggling up to me, resting a hand on my thigh, my breast, my stomach... And just barely, faintly, softly, breathing against my neck. I don't think you even realize you do it, but you do. And it feels divine. 

Biting your lip when I pull you close, bending your knee just enough to make it so I am finally the same size as you or taller. Looking up at me through your (unfairly!) gorgeous lashes. 

Draping your legs over mine (Especially when you're in your skirt so I can easily pet your legs <3), and wrapping your arms around my neck, to snuggle me. 

Bending over to pick something up/put something down, and teasing /me/ when I come up to playfully hump you (I'm so glad you put up with my butt-i-ness :P), by pressing back against me and grinding on me when you come back up. 

Making sure to reach over and touch me now and then if we're out of the house and around other people, to remind me that you're mine, you're here, I'm not forgotten. Making eye-contact if, for whatever reason, we're not next to each other, to do the same. 

Moaning for me, because you know I like it. 

Obeying every command, without making me repeat myself. 

Being mine. 

I can't wait 'til things slow down with the theater so we can have more time together again. While I love being there and helping out... The exhaustion from never being home, makes it so hard to take you, make love to you... 

I can't wait to have more time alone. <3 x

Wolfy is gone pretty much all day on Wednesdays now because of school. Comes home just in time for bed. 

So on days like today when I'm horny and there is no Wolfy to pounce, I get especially bitter. It sucks not being able to take advantage of the silly name. 

Screw you hump-day -.- haha

Move aside Elsa - there's a new queen in town;D 

Jokes aside, I couldnt help myself when this was the first thing I saw in the ice bar we went to. Holy crap I had so much fun. Poor Wolfy, not so much - he cant stand being cold, but he was such a good sport for me <3 I've wanted to visit one for over a decade, since I heard about the first one opening. This wasnt the original, since we were in Prague, but holy crap am I glad we went <3 

I wanted a pic of Wolfy kneeling in front of me here but... didn't feel it appropriate to ask total strangers to take that pic for us ^^; Haha. Oh well. 

Thought the pic was fun and decided to share :P 

 ... He gets rewarded. <3 

My love was a huge help making dinner, bought me a new, gorgeous bike (I was walking to work until now so that is a HUGE help!), and was super frigging snuggly all day, so he had to get some loving <3 

Happy Valentine's day, fellow Kinksters ;)

Breathe. Stop freaking out over every little thing. Sometimes, not being in control of everything is okay. Remember that. 

Don't go overboard with the planning. Not every second of every day needs to be accounted for. And that's totally okay. 

Just relax. Enjoy the moment. Stop stressing til you give yourself a headache. 

R. E. L. A. X.

You got this, Dark Fox. Just breathe. <3 

"These haven't gotten too hard this time."

I looked up to see my love patting a huge rolled up "haybale" of snow he made a week or so ago. Usually by now they would have become almost solid blocks of ice. I guess despite the rain and gross weather, that didn't happen this time. Smirking, I made my way over toward him, and asked, "You know what /does/ get hard though?"

As always with my slightly childish, albeit amusing to me, questions, I watched the switch in his head flip from confident adult to shy and nervous, a playful innocence. "Ummm..." I stopped in front of him, smirking. "Rocks?"

I laughed, looped my arms around him and pulled him close. "No... What /gets/ hard?" 

"A... Tree?"

Another laugh, and I saw the slightest hint of mischieviousness in his eyes. To most its unnoticeable. But to me? I see everything in those deep, gorgeous pools of blue, ringed in what oftentimes looks like gold. "C'mon now, you know what I'm asking." 

"Hard-boiled eggs?"

I laughed, "Those arent /actually/ hard, love."

He thought for a moment. "... Cement? Yeah! Cement gets hard!" His eyes lit up, and he looked so proud of himself. That was TOTALLY my answer, right?

I gently grasped his sides in my hands, a silent threat to tickle him if he didn't answer correctly soon enough. A squeal fled his lips, his body instinctively squirming to try and get away. "No, no, no!" He begged, "Okay! Umm!" A gasp, "Lava! Lava totally gets hard when it coo- Eep!" A few squeezes to his side to signal the incoming assault on his body. "Okay, okay! Umm! Waaaater when it starts to-"

"No, come on now!" I urged, laughing as I hooked one arm around him and pulled him close, starting to tickle up to his neck, "You know what I want! Just say it!" 

He laughed, squirming against me, "Umm rocks! No, I said that... water- no... um... I dont know!"

I pulled him in tight to me, nipped at his ear, and pulled back my head just enough to look at him. "Yes you do. What does get hard?"

At this point, that shy, innocent look returned to his eyes. The look that had my insides burning, wishing it wasnt freezing cold or broad daylight so I could just take him right there in the dog park. 

"... Me?" He said, soft and quiet, with a small smile gracing his lips. 

I smirked and leaned up to kiss him full on the lips. "That's right, my good boy," I purred. When I leaned back onto my feet, I noticed a blush rising up on his cheeks. No, that color wasnt from the cold, either. 

"I made you blush!" I cheered, laughing happily and attacking his face with kisses, "That rarely actually happens!"

"N-No!" He stammered, embarrassed, "Its just cold!"

"Nope~" I leaned in, nuzzled his red cheek, and then kissed him there, "You're blushing, it's so cute."

He uttered a few other words in protest, but I simply leaned up to kiss him. "I love you." 

A bit more of a blush, and he smiled down at me. "I love you too."

~~~~

So yesterday, something along these lines happened while we were trying to entertain ourselves during our dog's play. I dont remember all the details, mostly just how adorably innocent he was and how much his finally answering me and his blushing drove me crazy. But instead of just telling everyone about it i thought it would make a cute little story :) 

So... enjoy :P 

So... At work, I've been sucked up in an insane amount of drama. And I kinda want to vent about it because I'm just so... Angry. 

A supervisor, the one who I absolutely cannot stand but, sadly, work with basically every day, told all of the Spanish-speakers at my job, that they are not allowed to speak Spanish anymore. Only English. Because this is, "An American workplace". Even tried to tell another supervisor - who is technically his superior as he's been there the longest, used to be a manager at a different branch, and is right underneath our manager - that he wasn't allowed, either. In the office. Right in front of another store's manager.

All of this, without being told by /anyone/ to do this. My manager, the food court manager, the GM for our area... No one told him to issue this order. 

And it's highly illegal. 

Even worse, he only told the /Spanish/ speakers. Not the Germans. (Not that I want that! We're in their country, they should be allowed to talk German. Just saying, it's only fair, right?). 

He told myself, my best friend, and our other usual morning worker who no longer works with us, that an associate complained and he was putting his foot down. He then told the Spanish-speaking supervisor, and the night-crew who it effected, that a customer complained. We were eventually told who complained, and she tried to say that she had nothing to do with it... Despite other employees coming out to say they heard her complaining to the supervisor who tried to issue the order, and she made incredibly inappropriate comments a LOT about Mexicans (All of our Spanish-speakers have Mexican heritage) and the wall. In knowing earshot of some of those employees. Which isn't workplace appropriate. 

My manager was /pissed/, when she found out 4 days later as she left early the day this happened due to being ill, and then had three days off. Thank goodness. The supervisor is getting into serious trouble as this is /illegal/, and /she/ could have gotten into serious trouble for it despite not having anything to do with it. Luckily we all care about her so those effected didn't go to HR right away, they brought it to her attention first. 

The supervisor came back to work today, and unfortunately due to being really ill I had to call out. He called in the girl who made the complaint to take over the person's shift who was covering mine, and while my best friend was on break, they were /whispering shit/ about the situation and how mad they were that they were getting in trouble over this. 

Oh, how I wish I was there to tear them apart. Though to be fair, if I was there, I probably would have lost my job... I've been really, really upset over all of this, and I can't stand either of the two involved... Would've been really hard to keep my mouth shut. 

I have to work with him tomorrow... It'll be just him and I for half an hour til my best friend comes in... This is... Really going to be hard. 

I really don't want to wish ill on anyone, even if they do wrong by me or the people I love... But, a part of me, which I'm trying to fight off, is kind of hoping he doesn't last long here. He made a /lot/ of enemies over the last week... I don't think he, or the girl who complained, realize that.