Submitting with Purpose

I just need to feel the sting of a belt across my back because maybe then I can cry

I just need to feel you stare deep into my eyes

I do not care if it is in love or in anger I just want to feel

I just need to hear your voice cut into my soul

Speaking words of acceptance or of disappointment

Anything to make me realize I am alive. Present. Still here. 

I need to feel the pain in the physical realm so perhaps this emptiness will finally be filled with the pain I know its hiding. 

I need to feel anything. Because this emptiness just makes me realize they are no longer here. 

RIP my friend. My colleague. You will always be remembered.