Nymphomaniac in remission

It’s the middle of the night and mosquitoes woke me. Last night you and her ‘fought’ though it’s impossible to really fight with you. 

I opened your phone curious how you ended the day with her. Somehow there is always something to open my pain back up. This time I found it in the form of an open tab on google. ‘Eye contact blowjob’. 

Why is this imagine sexy to you when I am not? Loving, breathing, loving me? 

I wonder if you came and how you cleaned it up. 

I want to cry. 

I hope tomorrow I’ll be able to hide my resentment.