Never is a strong word when you think about it. It's a cold endless pit of nothingness meaning at no time will it happen. Never is never a guarantee though. Just because you can't or don't have what you want now doesn't mean you won't ever. This even extends to things you're lead to truly believe won't ever happen for one reason or another. So why use never when it's just an over exaggeration of what seems to be? I honestly don't have an answer to that deep thought but if you do or even have an opinion on what you think please let me know.
Anyway, the definition of the word "never" isn't really what this blog post is about. I just felt that would be a decent spot to start thinking on to spice this up a little bit and hopefully it's piqued your interest and maybe even got you to keep reading. What I really want to talk about is those feelings of wanting something you may never have. Something that feels too out of your league. I'm aiming to spark a conversation here because I could honestly use some insperation myself on how to deal with these strong thoughts, but I'll share with you my own as well.
For me I have these feelings toward guys I find the most attractive with a similar personality to my own; kind, thoughtful, friendly, a bit mysterious, and every once in awhile funny. I'll spare you the details on my ideal man for the sake of the fact that has nothing to do with what I'm talking about but it should be known that I struggle with body positivity in myself. I don't think I'm attractive. No I don't want to harm myself, and no I don't think I'll ever be loved or ever find someone who finds me attractive. I know to someone... Many someone's I'm perfect, or at least really great the way I am. And if any of those people were writing about me here right now they'd tell you I'm under-stating myself. I have no doubts about that.
What I'm saying when I don't have body positivity is that I don't believe any of the people I find attractive will ever like me simply because I'm not to them. Do I want to change? A little, but I'd have to make several changes to actually be where I'd want to be and I don't want to just go about changing who I am to try and be more appealing. Now things are getting a little derailed here on my topic for this post so allow me to get to the point. I feel I'll never be able to attract someone who I am attracted to, and that sucks.
It feels as if I have to lower my standards to get close to my ideal desires and that just doesn't seem right. So how do I deal with that? Simply put I have a mindset where I know that someone somewhere that I might be into would also be into me, we just haven't met yet. That doesn't make things any less hard though. In fact, sometimes it just makes things harder. When will I get the thing that I want if it's truly out there? Is there anything I could do to speed up the process? I can't tell you when you'll get what you desperately desire only that your chances of obtaining it will never be zero. I can tell you there is probably a way to speed things up.
For my particular case I have the internet, and online communities to help me find my ideal match. It's taking me a lot of confidence trying to be open about what I want but that's always the first step. You can't keep it bottled inside or else nobody will know what it is you're looking for, and won't be able to offer help if they can. Despite not having any luck I keep to my fantasies. They're there for a reason after all. They do make me crave what I want more but they keep my faith alive.
So what about you? Do you think there's a valid reason for using never? Is there something you want but feel you may never have? What are some ways you handle that positively? Maybe we could give you some insperation in the process, who knows. What I do know is that wanting things we feel we may never have is just what makes us human. I feel the majority of people feel this way too.
