What's on my mind

When I was young I always knew that I had another side to me I felt myself having the need to pleasure or to obey somebody. I know being in this lifestyle is nothing that you see on television and it's way different. but me being that young minded child that I was back then I always said what would I do if I was put in that situation? and I thought to myself and i sad that i wold love it  For me I love being told what to do I love being given commands I love being punished when I have got out of line or did something that I wasn't supposed to do. I love the basic things far as being tied down being handcuffed getting spankings and and all that other good stuff. But I really want to push my limits I really want to see what can I handle and what can I not handle?? anybody have any comments let me know.

I have been on this website for quite some time now and it seems like everybody on here either wants sex or is a phony. What does a girl have to do to find the right guy... the only thing I want and desire is for someone to love me for who I am, and to accept me for who I am. I can be a great submissive if I just have the right person to train me I am new to this lifestyle and I really think I would enjoy it. Somebody please help me to figure out what am I doing wrong? Am I being too picky I don't know what it is I don't want to date or be submissive somebody that doesn't deserve it.