Who are your teachers?

Who are your teachers?

MasterBear​(other butch) • Jan 17, 2019

I got to thinking about all of the people that have taught me throughout my Leatherwalk.

I have had many influences, both good and bad.
For some people I say "I want to emulate that"
For others I say "I want to do everything opposite of that ".


My biggest influences over the years have been:
Rap- taught me for free
VI Johnson- wrote to Love, To Obey, To Serve, changed my life
Leslie Feinberg- wrote Stone Butch Blues , changed my life.


A couple of groups in town who pushed me to start Obsidian because of their horrific behavior. I base a lot of what I do on being their opposite.

Monty Roberts- a horse trainer

So many.
When I think about it they didnt neccessary teach me skill but they deeply affected how I thought and acted.


Who are yours? And why?

alawey​(sub female){(OWNED BY } • Jan 17, 2019

MB. ,

I can say that for me there really isn't a list of ppl (with names) or a list of places.
i tend to take in everything and ask questions about everything whether it is kink or not , on here or not.
and the answers i am given to questions, or to why it is this way or not. i tend to think on and make a choice for me.

there have been things that i feel strongly about in both worlds , and was i will readily admit that i might have been a bit closed minded about. but after many of even just random talks with different ppl . i might still not agree but i can understand their viewpoint on it better now.

so i think we ( or at least me ) are learning from teachers (people and situations) everyday.

sorry if i didn't answer your question, but just my two cents

MasterBrads painpet​(sub female){OWNED} • Jan 17, 2019

Masterbear....

I can honestly say that the one who taught me the most was really my mom. I know a cliche right? But she taught me to be a well rounded woman, an individual who backs down from nothing. Because she was a mom of free teaching and love we weren't afraid to go to her about odd stuff. But as of today that's why I feel I can live my life differently than most. If I told her I'm in this LS she would really let me help you find out more. Make sure you don't get taken. Knowing her she would be quick to want to met my Dom and warn him that he better not hurt her baby bear.... Yes she would do that.

I've got so many but the man who was first in the vanilla and the first in BDSM taught me alot too. Maybe you didn't want to know it was a mom who taught me. Yet how she taught free unconditional love is my best lesson ever

DrWakko • Jan 18, 2019

In the kink world everyone is my teacher. I have taken classes with Jay Wiseman, Two Knotty Boys (Dan and Danarama), Uncle Abdul along with other great teachers and presenters.

I have been very lucky to live near several kink events as well as close to San Francisco.

MissBonnie​(dom female){oz} • Jan 24, 2019

If I go right back when dinosaurs walked the earth... My first teacher was a MFtrans ProDomme, that for all intents saved my life, grounded and taught me it was ok to be me (as a whole). When we met, she was in her late 60s and I was a homeless, lost 14 year old, although Jackie had no idea of this at the time, nor the reason I ran away from...my life! I think she just saw a hungry kid and had a kind heart. She brought me lunch, sat and said nothing for about thirty minutes. Next thing she tells me "you know us different people can talk together" Next thing I knew my mouth opened and all the words came out...my horrible family..being confused about being bi..my already active kink life that was step away from major problems. I used the word "weird" A LOT! She then tells me "honey, you are not weird your just lost in your sexual identity. Lets sort it out" .....That started my way down, my personal kinky path. I ended up sharing a house with Jackie for several years she was always my mentor, teacher, support and rock. If she couldn't answer query, she would someone for me that could. I would also tell her thank you. she used to say dont thank me, just keep the light bright and shine the way for someone else. I still try do that to this day. Others have helped me, like DrW said above, I too keep learning form others...but none will ever be like Jackie to me.

Villanelle​(staff) • Jan 24, 2019

MissBonnie's comment perfect illustrates why I have such respect for pro dominants, even though we don't allow them to practice in a professional capacity here on THE CAGE (private profiles are welcome). Pros are often mentors, educators, and leaders in their communities. It would be a mistake for anyone to confuse them with the trolls and scammers looking to shake down vulnerable submissives for cash.

Bunnie • Jan 24, 2019

@ MissBonnie, your recount is so beautiful, thank you for sharing that

“Who are yours? And why?”

The cage was the first place I found myself when I finally decided to stop denying who I am. I arrived here very green and very naive. I had never even spent any time online apart from fb. It was here that I met some wonderful lifestylers who took me under their wing and helped guide and nurture me. They pointed me to fet, where I found an offline community who became like family. Most of the people I have interacted with would be considered Old Guard or quite traditional or strict... however I’m glad to have that foundation.

The patience, acceptance, guidance, care, nurture, skill, knowledge and teachings of so many different people have carried with me, and I am so grateful. I once believed it was my obligation out of respect for those people to try to “pay it forward” and pass on their wisdom and knowledge, however I have come to recognise that that’s not my role... I’m not a teacher.

I’ve also come to realise that for me it’s not about words... it’s about example. It’s easy to say “I know the way because I am a Master... and all those other Masters are wrong... and if they disagree, just block them!” Or “I am a slave and I will do anything you ask of me.” Actually putting those things into action are very different. Those that live this... those are the people I respect, and thank goodness, those are the people I have had the honour of learning from.

However, having said that... I believe we learn from everyone... even if it’s learning what not to do... or what doesn’t fit right for us. As much as I hate the word, I think it’s about finding that balance of reading, observation, learning and putting into action. Theory is great for concepts and ideas, however, I believe that once specific skills are required, hands-on training from someone with those skills and knowledge... and also tips and tricks that you won’t find in books, because they can only be discovered by trial and error... are invaluable... not just as a “D”, but as an “s” also.

This is generally where it branches into people arguing over “one true wayism.” My belief is that if you have the foundation, you can do with it as you please. Some knowledge only comes from living it. I worry that our “elders” are being forgotten because people feel that they’re too constricting in their ways.

Hopefully one day, it will be considered cool again to at least know a bit about the different varieties of histories of bdsm, rather than just spanking someone’s ass.