An Ode to People Who Read Your Bio Before Messaging You
4 years ago • 04/27/2017 6:45 pm
Paige_LaMarchand(sub female) • 04/27/2017 6:45 pm
You know, rather than just looking at your photo and sending:
Being a guy and telling me all about what sort of interests they have in kink and D/s when I'm a lesbian.
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This happens on all the social media platforms that could even remotely be considered dating platforms (I don't consider this to be one, being that I haven't posted a classified, but okay).
And it's only men who do it. If a woman contacts me, it's because she's responding to a writing and has something to say.
And this is common for most women on the internet. I hear about it All. The. Time.
My personal favourite response, ever, didn't happen on this platform, but I must share.
Him: Hi, are you looking for a Dom?
Me: Yes, but I'm a lesbian.
Him: I don't mind.
As though he would overlook some fault in order to be my Dominant. That's not how it works.
This is why I don't spend much time on forums or dating apps. Even choosing 'hide my account from heterosexuals' on OK Cupid gets straight women trolling for a third for them and their husbands even though my profile says very clearly, right at the top LESBIAN. You can't win if you're a woman on the internet.
And don't tell me it's a compliment, fellas. If gay guys were talking to you and trying it on and making comments all the time even though you stated you were straight, you'd be annoyed, too. Particularly if you lived in a culture that told you your worth was based on if gay guys wanted to fuck you.
'Just block them, then.'
That's the 'no means no' version of social media and I thought we were supposed to be all about 'yes means yes'? No woman should have to block unwanted advances and time-wasting messages from people who haven't even bothered to read their bios. If they *had* read your bio they wouldn't have wasted their *own* time by sending a message in the first place.
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To the People Who Read Your Bio Before Messaging You:
Thank you, wherever you may be. With all the people in the world, I'm sure you exist, I just haven't met any of you yet.
The people who treat me like a person are the people who listen to my show. It's as though, because they've heard my voice and information about my life they know I'm an actual human being. I *do* genuinely thank those people. But they're nice because they've already learned I'm a human and don't exist merely to fulfill their fantasies.