Collars

Bunnie • Apr 24, 2019

I see a collar as a piece of jewellery that symbolises your commitment to each other and the dynamic you’re building/have established together.

Where my view may differ slightly here, is that what symbolises “being owned” for me, is being tattooed/branded, and/or pierced... in my opinion, that is when one becomes property (M/s).

^

KillerAddiction​(switch female) • Apr 25, 2019

Personally I love collars/chokers and have a decent collection ranging from leather to lace to chains...
However, there is one /specific/ collar in the collection that is used purely for the sexual aspect.
I understand a collar is earned ect but in my current relationship the collar is seen as a sign that I'm feeling submissive, that I want my partner to be in control [my partner is primarily submissive so a sign /is/ needed].
I wouldn't mind wearing a day collar if I ever got into a relationship with a very dominant partner though

Re Collaring

BabyGirlFL​(sub female){His} • Apr 27, 2019

I’m very new to the lifestyle and my dom is taking his time with me. We are exclusive, but he is wanting to be very sure we can trust each other before diving deeper into some of the bdsm elements, like collaring. I know he knows best because I am sensitive and need to be stronger and more confident to engage further in heavy play. He’s treading lightly, and our love and trust is deepening. I want to be collared but I take it more seriously than a wedding ring (have been married twice) and that step will be a serious and permanent one, where I am giving myself over to him and his decisions for me as close to 100% as I can get (I have two kids so I am a little tentative with the remaining percentage points since they are involved). Also of note is that my dom has had other subs in the past and is familiar with the lifestyle. He thinks symbols like collaring, contracts, etc are all up to the two people and that there is no prescribed way to do it. That being said, I will wear his ring, brand, collar, tat, or all or none of it just to be with him, and he is eager to give me what I need.

PrimalSelf​(dom male) • Apr 28, 2019

To me a collar is a sign of commitment and ownership. As a dominant, I wouldn’t do it to a submissive unless I was serious about the relationship - because to me, that symbolism is beautiful.

But yeah, I do see a lot of people misusing it, because the dominants that are in BDSM and D/s for the rush find it sexy but lose interest shortly after,

Satindragon{Not Lookin} • Apr 28, 2019

I personally believe to much emphasis is placed on the collar and not enough on building the relationship that goes with it.

Velcro collars are collars that are given without the putting in the time and effort to build a lasting relationship. They come off just as easily and quickly as they were put on. In essence, they are meaningless.

The relationship between a Domaint and submissive goes far beyond that of a traditional/ vannila relationship.

I am collared. I have a leather house collar, several day collars, and a heart shaped locking collar. I only remove my locking collar when necessary. It would rip my heart out to be released. My goal is to someday earn the honor of the Rose Ceremony and a slave collar.

New to bdsm

fluttergirlsub{Uncollared} • Apr 28, 2019

I've done a great deal of reading on our lifestyle. The collar is akin to a wedding ring as most have indicated on here. Some use collars of consideration, training collars and so on. Most would not marry a person right away and so collaring ought to take time as well. Don't rush it...

Satindragon{Not Lookin} • Apr 28, 2019

When I re-read my responce I noticed that I left some important information about collars. If you are interested in this lifestyle and have done the proper research you know there are several different collars with different meanings. Yet most articles leave out the most important collar of them all, the invisible collar.

The invisible collar is the collar of the heart, mind and spirit. It binds like no piece of metal, or leather ever could. My collar is merely my security blanket that holds me when he is not physically with me. I miss him, I give the lock a kiss. When I get stressed I hold the lock in my hand and it gives me comfort.

drdomme​(sub female) • Apr 29, 2019

From what I've read, the collaring ceremony is as significant as a wedding ceremony. And typically if the sub is female, she is topless during it.

SoaringFree​(sub female) • Apr 29, 2019

I love the idea of receiving a collar. I think actually receiving one and posting in the collar section of your profile are completely different instances. On here, it's simply a way of showing a partnering of members. Some may use it differently, but that's what I've observed.
Through conversations with Doms they seem to agree that collaring their sub is a commitment similar to marriage. In this, I think both members involved need to make sure they both agree to what it means to them so there arent any misunderstandings.
On that note, as long as they both agree, then all is right whether its long term commitment or not.

Bunnie • Apr 29, 2019

Just randomly came across this... thought it was interesting, so figured I’d share it.

http://www.masterzchicago.com/Collars.htm