Defining slave/Submissive/Bottom

MasterBear​(other butch) • Jul 6, 2019

Identities are interesting things. And often times in BDSM identities are determined by looking at somebody who's in a relationship and doing a compare and contrast.


I think I put this question back to you and simply say what do those terms mean to you?

If you were to take on the identity of the bottom would that be something that feels right to you?

What about the term slave?

If no, why not? What do you think of when you look at these identities?


Because everybody defines these identities differently and often times in context of a relationship it is almost impossible to get an actual universally recognized definition.

What I say defines a slave quite frankly only to find a slave for me and my understanding of the role. Another M type may determine that my definition of a slave it's not how they define it.


The most complex part of BDSM, in my opinion, is that there are no rules. There are no globally agreed upon definitions where a person can say -- I am that thing without question.

RelentlessDomination​(dom male) • Jul 6, 2019

Soulweaver's distinction between submissive and slave jives nicely with the description given by Deborah Teramis Christian.

http://www.teramis.com/kink/subvslave.htm

Taking an assist from Steven Davis from an old alt.sex.bondage newsgroup from 1995, she writes that "A submissive renews the choice to submit every time a demand is levied upon hir. A slave makes a one-time choice to submit, up front, and thereafter it is incumbent upon hir to obey."

I would encourage those interested to read the entire article, but here are two more extracts:

"A submissive chooses to submit and has the option to say 'no' in at least one aspect of hir life.....A slave commits to obey. A 'no' becomes a dealbreaker in a way it can never be for a submissive."

The ever so unbalanced query

Evolocity​(dom male) • Jul 15, 2019

My reply is my own opinion and based on my experience through education, life experience and career. This is just my view.

I believe everyone can have a slightly different view of each role. To me a dominant is the foundation of a top. Just as submission is foundation for a bottom.

Master and slave are acquired aspects and mindset which are placed on top of the foundation.

A slave gives up all things including her voice. A sub does not lose her voice and opinion.

I do not train slaves as I feel it’s unhealthy to train that alone. I train them to understand submission first then each the slave portion. Hence they train as a subslave.

Mainstream has become so distorted in what’s what that it’s akmost impossible to find a group that actually agrees on definitions.

This is a brilliant article, thank You for sharing

eyesblueforyou • Jul 25, 2020