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Advice for Newbies

PrincessSunshine​(sub female)
5 years ago • Aug 14, 2019

Advice for Newbies

Hello friends!

I thought it would be interesting to start a forum of advice for new members to the community. If you had to pick just ONE thing you wish you had known when you first joined, what would it be?

<3 PrincessSunshine
No Body​(dom male)
5 years ago • Aug 14, 2019
No Body​(dom male) • Aug 14, 2019
Be honest about who you are and what you are. Let no one tell you you're wrong or "just sick". You are neither. You are a human being with desires and needs. Seek them out and enjoy your life more than they ever will.
Bunnie
5 years ago • Aug 14, 2019
Bunnie • Aug 14, 2019
Don’t be afraid to be different...
CrimsonRose
5 years ago • Aug 14, 2019
CrimsonRose • Aug 14, 2019
Be honest with yourself and others, if you don't know, it is okay. Don't be afraid to ask for help from those you trust. Make friends, and be a friend. Blessings from TXRed
AKittenforSir​(sub female){JohnBond}
5 years ago • Aug 14, 2019
Don’t be intimidated into keeping your limits list short, especially if you are playing with a self proclaimed sadist. I’ve known sadists with the mentality of “Welp, you didn’t list shaving your head as a limit so bring me a razor and let’s have some fun.”

Just because you’re a sub doesn’t mean you can’t require monogamy from your partner.

Being submissive doesn’t mean you have to be a masochist and not all Doms are sadistic.

A collar means what you and your partner agree that it means, not what anyone else tells you it means.

You aren’t any less of a sub if you haven’t had formal training.

You can still have romance and love in a BDSM relationship.
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dragonbaby​(sub female)
5 years ago • Aug 15, 2019
dragonbaby​(sub female) • Aug 15, 2019
Don't be scared about scaring potential Doms away with limits regarding initial conversations, meetings...etc. The one who is serious will respect that and work through it, work to get to know you as a person first.
Switch Like The Moon​(switch female)
5 years ago • Aug 15, 2019
I am new here and was rudely told that I dont belong here because I didnt respond to a message while I was sick. And mind you this "dom" had not discussed being my dom...we were in the chatting and getting to know each other stage and decided to tell me I shouldn't be on here if I'm not ready to commit. My profile states I need to connect and ease into this as I've not been in the lifestyle for a while.

I am not discouraged.
dragonbaby​(sub female)
5 years ago • Aug 15, 2019
dragonbaby​(sub female) • Aug 15, 2019
That's been my experience a couple of times Obedient Day. One got really incensed and I was flabbergasted. I don't have really thick skin, so that bothered me a while. You are good not to be discouraged.