rosethorn wrote:
I am curious as to how people might handle changes to their role.. personally i don't have a contract or more of a verbal one. Especially when it can change the dynamic, communication is key. Im thinking how this might be discussed, taken onboard and into the dynamic. Because when the dynamic changes the relationship can too.
I think I hear you saying that you are curious about someone switching sides of the slash when they haven't before. And how that might effect a D/s dynamic. There is a lot to think about here. If a person is feeling for whatever reason that they want to explore the other side of the slash then I feel that a serious discussion needs to be had. This can't be a one-sided decision. Both parties will be affected. In my situation switches sometimes bottom for me for play. If in the middle of play they decided to switch, I would be done playing, because I can't bottom. I don't know how and I have no desire to learn. (I love and respect bottoms and submissives I just don't want or need the skillset)
If it's been discussed and both parties are interested in trying this, then one of the things the former bottom now top can do in his or her new role as top is to try to teach bottoming. Think about how bottoming works for you and break it down. Maybe slowly go through the toy bag one item at at time and try each item out, at several levels of intensity, to allow the person receiving to learn their limits. The former top now bottom can remember what feed back he or she needed as a top and work to provide that. But that's the tech side. On the dynamic side, If the D wants to become the s or the s wants to be the D type, that is going to change how things work. I think that it can be fluid because I know a couple that are both switches. And they just work out in what ways each party takes the lead. It's very practical. He tends to get over invested in too many hobbies so she has taken charge of that. She tends to be an impulse shopper so he holds the reins in that area. Both have the final word over each other's health, since they both tend to over extend physically for others. The balance they have is elegant tbh.
So there are some thoughts on what I was thinking you might be asking.