Conversation Starter: Fashion

Byrdie​(switch female){rl only} • Jan 23, 2020

As a Domme or sub, what is your ideal kink-wear?

Privately: If I just working someone over, some light flowy shorts and a sleeveless t-shirt. I don’t like to feel constricted.

At an event: I’m willing to dress it up a bit with a fancy corset-shirt - not an actual corset, but more like a femmy-shirt with lacing in the front and no boning. I’m happy to wear that with a skirt and / or leggins, and flat boots or mary janes.

What about day to day additions to your public wardrobe? I’m looking at becoming a keyholder, so I’m considering wearing the key as part of a necklace or some such. I’m considering adding separator beads to my FitBit necklace so that I can add a bit more lifestyle flair to it.

What materials do you like the most/hate?
Like? Breathable. Petable. Cotton, lace, velvet, even flannel.
Dommey: Breathable. Petable. Cotton, lace, velvet, even flannel.
Daily: Work drag: cotton-poly blends that, while using my favorite colors, are comfortable.
Hate? Traditional fetish fabrics / materials like leather, pvc, rubber, etc. Great for photo shoots, but not for me.

What immediately catches your interest in public that makes you question the personal affiliations of a stranger and if they're into the same?
High goth, what we used to call “gender-bending” back in ye olden days, high leather boots when the weather is fine.

What attire makes you feel more the part/yourself?
“I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.” - Gilda Radner

Purple, hot pink, and magenta fabrics. My awesome purple Nike hightops, but really low heel decorative shoes that I can walk comfortably in.

What goes too far and makes you feel like you're playing a part? Clothing that feels more like it’s wearing me more than I’m wearing it: leather, pvc, rubber, etc. I just watched the Tom of Finland movie and I’ve been to the Folsom Street Fair: there are some lovely looks that folks pull off, but I don’t require it of anyone because it doesn’t turn my crank. I’m puffy enough as it is, so I don’t tend to wear pouffy clothes. Heels, as I always feel like I’m going to twist an ankle.

What screams ...
... Domme to you? Demeanor.
... sub to you? Demeanor.
... in private/public? Demeanor.

What do you like to wear/wish you could wear/like to see?
Me, actual: Cute shoes, magenta toe nails, warm jewel tones and autumns
Me, wishing: jewel-tone, taper-leg suits, my dreads in ringlets, mini-kilts
Him: Dandyism, subtle gender-bending with softer fabrics, colors that flatter his skin tone, neru rather than traditional collars - perhaps with a broach closure.

thinker​(switch male){no} • Jan 23, 2020

have to say I do enjoy pencil skirts. Actually enjoy being bound and gagged in them and wearing no panties at times for the mistress. pencil skirts lookreally good when chair bound and before stripping nude for the Mistress

MasterBear​(other butch) • Jan 27, 2020

Just a side note here. A couple of years ago we went to two events within about a month of each other. One was geared towards Masters and slaves. One was a general event.



At the The Master and slave event, the slaves had on sweatpants, tennis shoes, comfortable shirts. They knew they had to run to the drugstore or order food or be in the middle of some sort of public something to make sure their Masters were taken care of. At that particular event pretty much everybody had a cold. So as types were running back and forth to drugstores the whole weekend.



On the flip side at the general event the s types were all wearing short skirts or really tight clothes or the least amount that was legal. Really high heels sometimes no panties. All while sitting on the floor.

( which by the way, was not sexy at all to me. All I could think about was " your going to need some strong antibiotics to take care of whatever is crawling into your cooler right now")


Those two experiences stuck with me for years.

latexbondagebunny​(other male) • Jan 27, 2020

In the public world I’m someone you won’t notice as my fashion is mainstream and unassuming(jeans and T-shirts). Though that’s on the surface, underneath I tend toward tight underwear and chastity cages. I also wear my Byzantine chain necklace (Collar) everywhere as it has never been taken off in the past 16 yrs.

Now I have an almost fetish for latex and tight clothes, especially the more feminine styles. Tight stockings, corsets and hoods. This part of me isn’t let out enough for my tastes but once out, I’m out with a vengeance.

MstressWhipplash​(dom female) • May 22, 2020

It depends on the Event and what I intenf to do there.

For thr Cruel Huntress Hunt Hunters leggings a gym top snd jacket sometimes a Dressage hat snd dun glasses as it'san outdoor chading prey rvent.

For Pestal all sortd of outfits:
A black leathet dress black boots and opera gloves, a black lace corset with flowing satin skirt. A black & red long latex dress, a Russian captains hat jacket and trouders/boots.

A Pony trainer outfit fot Pony week UK .

Thr Head Mistress at a school look I feel awkward in until thr dilly stuff starts but I prefer to get right to csninh a willing derrier.

I mostly wear dresses with a split to one stocking top boots and gloves.

House Talion​(dom male) • May 22, 2020

I'm all about the leather. Got pants, boots, vest, and hat. Been trying to get a very light white leather long sleeve collared shirt, but such would be so expensive and making it is gruesome

heartbrokengirl​(sub female) • May 23, 2020

I have very eclectic style and my Daddy loves it most of the time. Very rarely he will say, "baby, you know I appreciate your fun style but that is not my favorite." so that get reserved for when Daddy isn't there haha.
When I am not with Daddy I dress my style but I'm not allowed anything overly sexy or revealing in public its for Daddy's eyes only. So not too tight pants, no short skirts, and not a lot of cleavage. When were alone or spending the day together showing off is part of the fun.

Daddy loves me to wear sexy lace under my clothes that way he is the only one who knows whats under. Gets him going knowing that he is the only one who has seen whats being worn underneath.

ThirtyFourPointFive • May 23, 2020

I love the feel of Satin\Silk on a woman.. there is nothing like walking up behind her and sliding my hand up to cup a breast when she is wearing it. Very sexy.

tallslenderguy​(other male) • May 23, 2020

Fascinating topic.

If the intent is to grab the part of my self that is tucked away behind a socially acceptable facade, attitude and intent are what counts, add mind fuck and you awaken my deeper self.

This pic sums it up for me. Nothing about that pic screams (stereotypical) kid to me, There is an incongruity to it that stops an automatic, conditioned response to the clothing and makes my emotions say: "wait a minute" and pay attention to the wearer. It throws me off balance.

Fashion was more important to me as a little kid than it is as an adult. i was a mix as a kid, i played house and with dolls, and i played 'army' and trucks. i have a hard time using the word "sissy," but i think i was when i was little. That part of me got progressively buried and was 'gone' by the time i was 12. But as a 7 or 8 year old i had two velvet V neck shirts, a red and a green, that i literally loved. But i felt too exposed wearing them , the V felt too revealing. my older sister gave me a white turtleneck dickie to wear them with, and it completed them for me. i felt very fancy wearing them.

When i was in my 20's, i liked very tight bikini underwear. i also saw a pic of a guy in overalls that were form fitting and he was wearing them sans shirt. It spoke to something in me and i bought a pair wanting the same look. i was part of a strict religion and fairly newly married and my wife did not like either the underwear or overalls. We both sensed something taboo about them and guiltily gave up the overalls, even 'confessing' i liked them because they affirmed and made that "taboo" part of me feel good. We were young and clueless, but we still sensed the kink even though we didn't have words for it. my former wife helped bury any fashion taste i had left as a younger adult. She (inadvertently i think) undermined my taste, even mocked it, and i just mostly gave up and wore what she liked or chose, but it wasn't in a D/s sort of way, she feared who i was and worked to change or suppress that and my clothes reflected a look that wasn't me.

Now, 12 years divorced and single, i wear jeans and and t shirts out. Tight jeans and leather shoes with a sport coat for dinner out. Scrubs at work, sweats at home.
i did buy some padded underwear to make my bum a little rounder and more pronounced, but do not often wear them

i have two dresser drawers full of toys, chastity cages, lace underwear, thongs and jocks... and there they stay for the most part. All of them purchased because of a fantasy or real person who wanted to use them on me or for me to wear them. They do not hold meaning or power for me without a Top or Dom to associate them with. It's the response that those things elicit in another that brings out what they are going to in me.

Which is not to say i am a blank canvass, i am not, it's more that a Guy sees or knows about something in me and activates that part of me by a corresponding desire or taste. Then, ideally what i wear is a reflection of His desire connecting with mine.

Does this all come off as gibberish?