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Are you a true masochist?

simplylaura​(sub female){djinni}
4 years ago • Sep 3, 2020
I think that was communicated as well. It was the use of "true" that people struggled with. I am a "true masochist" in that I get turned on by pain. . But I'm also more than that. I think she was asking if there were people who *only* identify as a masochist, which there are- it was an issue of language and then defensiveness. I'm not trying to beat a dead horse, just respond to your comment.
shahh
4 years ago • Sep 3, 2020

Re: Adding more

shahh • Sep 3, 2020
konvikdomination wrote:
All
As I would never apologize for anything to anyone. I would ask that the understanding of the untrained in emotional venting be allowed here. I have been the sadist she speaks of. It is a new dynamic for her. She came as a little very new to what the darkness of this lifestyle can bring and the joy. I am a true sadist I derive my complete understanding of me from pain. She found a new side to herself and found pride in it. She has not been. The best at relaying her words. I asked her to start a thread on masochist. I see in here only submissive females and was hoping she would find someone like her to help her explore. Sometimes thoughts and words don’t come across well in forum setting. I am by no means a dominant to subs. Way to much responsibility and emotional care. This reaction is probably my fault for not guiding her into this


Several of us have identified as Masochist as well...throughout this and other threads. This hasn't been 'just submissive women". You do not need to defend an adult from being unwilling to have a conversation and listen to those with different views. And no one has the right to diminish anyone else just because they are new to this lifestyle. This is a place of inclusion and 'your kink is your kink' and somewhere to learn and embrace that different and the outskirts of BDSM is awesome.
KnottyBunny
4 years ago • Sep 3, 2020
KnottyBunny • Sep 3, 2020
My words may not have been taken the way they were meant. Just wanted to know if there were others that liked pain but it also being outside of a D/s dynamic. Thats it. Everyone else that did not just straight up answer the question twisted my words to what they wanted to hear. And I will not apologize because I did nothing wrong.
shahh
4 years ago • Sep 3, 2020
shahh • Sep 3, 2020
Wow. Just wow.

I enjoyed everyone's thoughtful and open mineded responses though. Some very good conversation in the midst of narrow minded, discriminatory and judging behavior that this community does not support.
AmericanPsycho{None}
4 years ago • Sep 3, 2020

Re: Adding more

AmericanPsycho{None} • Sep 3, 2020
shahh wrote:
konvikdomination wrote:
All
As I would never apologize for anything to anyone. I would ask that the understanding of the untrained in emotional venting be allowed here. I have been the sadist she speaks of. It is a new dynamic for her. She came as a little very new to what the darkness of this lifestyle can bring and the joy. I am a true sadist I derive my complete understanding of me from pain. She found a new side to herself and found pride in it. She has not been. The best at relaying her words. I asked her to start a thread on masochist. I see in here only submissive females and was hoping she would find someone like her to help her explore. Sometimes thoughts and words don’t come across well in forum setting. I am by no means a dominant to subs. Way to much responsibility and emotional care. This reaction is probably my fault for not guiding her into this


Several of us have identified as Masochist as well...throughout this and other threads. This hasn't been 'just submissive women". You do not need to defend an adult from being unwilling to have a conversation and listen to those with different views. And no one has the right to diminish anyone else just because they are new to this lifestyle. This is a place of inclusion and 'your kink is your kink' and somewhere to learn and embrace that different and the outskirts of BDSM is awesome.





I agree with your thought process. But when you are a wife mom and love a life. Get divorced as a woman. Over time you find hey I like some kinky shit. You meet one guy that kinda gets it done then that breaks. And then you meet me. Not exactly fair. In this lifestyle. You have to go from being a wife. Or girlfriend. To a man that tells you. Your a fuck hole and I love just beating and fucking you. On my terms. It’s really a long distance to step. I will protect her words because I know she is learning. She is unfortunately learning with me.
shahh
4 years ago • Sep 3, 2020
shahh • Sep 3, 2020
Excuses...that's all that is. So many here have been through hell and back and have stayed respectful and open to discussion. Let's not start checking the boxes of difficult pasts, challenging circumstances and personal choices in play partners/ life partners as allowances to treat people like garbage. Everyone has a history, some...far darker than others... So that is an unacceptable excuse.
SweetSirRendering​(sub female)
4 years ago • Sep 3, 2020
look, she specifically denied trans people. she tried to qualify what makes a real masochist. she has no idea, so she should learn to listen. we all took time to give thoughtful answers and nobody twisted her words. if she is looking for someone who identifies as only masochist to learn from, APEX is a big group, many resources online, podcasts, blogs, here.

if she chooses to be part of a community, she may want to spend some time learning how to accept others as nobody was anything less than open and honest. no inclusive community will allow the language she used. we need to be accountable for ourselves and when we don’t know anything, we need to shut our mouths and listen, in my opinion. we were all being very nice to her. i will not continue being nice to people that deny my sister (mtf) and best friends son (ftm) or any of the many others that have a hard enough time waking up every day of their lives in the wrong body and then having to walk out bravely while some close minded people deny their existence. no. and this community agrees. read the rules. we are all human, all in this together, and nobody is more legitimate than anyone else.
KnottyBunny
4 years ago • Sep 3, 2020
KnottyBunny • Sep 3, 2020
yes they have. I trulu believe I was too emotional in my responses and I apologize for that but even my trans friend said that what I said was not discriminatory or wrong with i said before I even posted it. He as he likes to be addressed now said that he identified himself online as FTM. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I apologize for being emotional and my words said wrong. I truly was just trying to find others like me and just saying that pain is pain and humiliation is humiliation no matter what degree. Goodnight.
AmericanPsycho{None}
4 years ago • Sep 3, 2020

Umm

AmericanPsycho{None} • Sep 3, 2020
shahh wrote:
Excuses...that's all that is. So many here have been through hell and back and have stayed respectful and open to discussion. Let's not start checking the boxes of difficult pasts, challenging circumstances and personal choices in play partners/ life partners as allowances to treat people like garbage. Everyone has a history, some...far darker than others... So that is an unacceptable excuse.


No excuses where made here. And you acceptance of my words were very unneeded
SweetSirRendering​(sub female)
4 years ago • Sep 3, 2020
AriesGoddess wrote:
yes they have. I trulu believe I was too emotional in my responses and I apologize for that but even my trans friend said that what I said was not discriminatory or wrong with i said before I even posted it. He as he likes to be addressed now said that he identified himself online as FTM. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I apologize for being emotional and my words said wrong. I truly was just trying to find others like me and just saying that pain is pain and humiliation is humiliation no matter what degree. Goodnight.


grownups should know how to be accountable and apologize. we all know what that actually looks like.

you found others like you, it is too bad you tried to find the differences instead. do people need to qualify with a list of how hardcore they are to meet your approval, because i won’t be supplying that, beyond playful glimpses into our space.

if you prefer not to speak to anyone that doesn’t fit whatever you have decided is just like you, maybe put up an add on the personals page and avoid a public forum where we all participate as a community to enrich the community...

if you realize you have no idea yet what you are definitively, welcome and enjoy the community. open your mind or be sure to close the door on your way out. inclusivity includes you, but the version you displayed today violates the terms.