Private parts in profiles

Private parts in profiles

The Thinker​(sadist male){NotLooking} • Oct 8, 2020

We all know that men who post pictures of their penis in their profile are many things, none of which are good. In fact, the question that is often asked by women is this, what are they trying to compensate for?

Yet, I see women posting pictures of breasts, vagina, and the rear end orifice all the time.

What's the story there? What are these women trying to compensate for?

shortylotus​(dom female) • Oct 8, 2020

I was never able to exactly put a finger on what was missing from my profile....but now its clear...i guess its bathroom selfie time.....

tallslenderguy​(other male) • Oct 8, 2020

Personally, i don't see a problem with 'private parts' pics on a BDSM site. i see our sexuality as a part of who we are and i don't think it's inappropriate on a site like this. If that's all a person has or shows on their profile, it strikes me as sketchy, but i like seeing all the parts and don't automatically think of it as compensatory. We never say: "that person has written a profile about their self, i wonder what they are trying to compensate for?" They are just showing another part of their self as far as i'm concerned. Showing the sexy parts is an expression of the persons sexual side, and that's okeedokee with me.

Zerospace​(dom male){Amalthea} • Oct 8, 2020

I would also argue that intent is a factor here. Is this person trying to attract a mate? Many are, and body pix are just bonuses on that resume. What if they are exhibitionists? Then body pix are totally in their idiom.

And, as tallslenderguy pointed out, this is a BDSM site so sexuality is foremost on most people's minds. Body pix fit the context. Not to mention the norm for many dating sites (and this is very much a dating site, in part).

So are some compensating? Maybe. Maybe they are shy, as well. A shy person may have no issues posting a body pic bc it doesn't give away their identity (which is really what shy people are afraid of sharing, for fear of rejection and such reasons).

Lots of factors here.

Personally, I just enjoy the body pix for what they are: people sharing a side of themselves in what they hope/perceive to be a safe environment.

But on that note, I don't foresee me ever sharing pix of my dick. But you never know...🤨

Sasa​(dom female) • Oct 8, 2020

Why not, if the pictures are good (sadly rare) and it’s not the only part they share ... I don’t think „women“ are annoyed... some are, some not ... but those who are, often start a little prudish shitstorm and that’s noisier. Nobody is compensating anything. We enjoy what we see or we leave. This is a fetish forum.

Zerospace​(dom male){Amalthea} • Oct 8, 2020

And beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What pix I see that are not to my taste might be someone else's image of Heaven itself.

We should listen to the Vulcans more: Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations

That's what makes the world so cool.

Hypnotist​(dom male) • Oct 8, 2020

Here's the way I see the issue of private parts photos. The men are not trying to compensate for anything (see below), and the women who share such photos do so because they know men enjoy them, and they find pleasure in knowing that men enjoy looking at their photos (or because men pay for them).

Men are much more visual than women, and they are much more likely to want to see photos of a woman's private parts, and when they get to see such photos they enjoy looking at them. For some men, it also makes them feel special when a woman is willing to show them photos that she is not showing to her neighbor, or her parents, or the mail man. They think "She showed me her coochie in a photo, I must be more special to her than most of other people in her life".

That being said, there are a significant number of men who, for one reason or another, think "Hey, I would really like to see photos of her naked, so of course she would like to see photos of me naked too.

A majority of men who think that way are so certain that their thinking is correct that they tend to ignore what they think is a minority of women who speak out against being sent or shown photos of a man's private parts unsolicited. They think "I really want to see photos of her private parts, and I really enjoy when I do get do see them, so she must really enjoy getting photos of my private parts too. Yeah, sure there are a few women who speak out against it. But that's just a small number of all the women out there. The rest, who don't speak out against it, surely want to see my dick".

comrade​(sub female) • Oct 8, 2020

I just thought it was fun to post one, and as a midsize woman I want people to know what I look like because I often feel too chubby and like a catfish If I don't explicitly tell people that I'm not stick skinny. I'm really curious to know if people enjoy seeing a pic in the bio or if they'd rather not have that there? I don't think I'm trying to overcompensate for anything but If you honestly think it's tacky and trying too hard I'll get rid of the pic.

Zerospace​(dom male){Amalthea} • Oct 8, 2020

Not tacky at all. Just you, putting yourself out there in an honest way. Honest to you and for others. It is appreciated.

Hypnotist posits that men are more visual than women. I can't speak to that, but personally I am more aural. I LOVE the audio clips women leave. And I don't need them to get all breathy and sexy in the clip. Just their voice can be a turn on. Hell, my favorite is a woman telling a silly joke. Makes me laugh and she has an incredible voice.

Since I am aural by default, I put up a clip too, in case someone else felt the same way. Visually, I think the gothic painting I posted on my profile speaks more about me than any selfie (regardless of what body part I capture).

I think we just represent ourselves any way that makes sense to us. "This is me" sort of thing. It is the hook. Then, if people take the bait, they explore you and get to know you through all the other various methods of contact available here. That's just socializing. No different than wearing specific clothes when you go out in public. Incidentally, I actually own a tshirt with that same gothic painting on it. So I am literally practicing what I preach here. 😁

RedSwitch​(switch female) • Oct 8, 2020

I can only speak for myself, so here goes. I do not see it negative. There is the option to not see the pictures due to the nature. I personally think that we have to see that voyeurism is a big thing as well in the BDSM community. Maybe they want to see it here because they cannot elsewhere. We all have our kinks and fetishes. Just pass if you don’t like or agree. Take what you do. I used to find things offensive because I was compensating for my hidden desires...I knew I liked certain things but was shameful due to my upbringing and society and it’s cruelty. I am here because I want to explore it all and figure out what I don’t like. I love and am one of the people who is open minded. Let’s each do our own and we will find our match(es). Love to you all. Really. No judgement from me on anyone for their views, feelings & opinions. Would we really be here if we were that judgemental?