Learning new things

Learning new things

BabyTgirl​(sub female){Not lookin} • Nov 9, 2020

Lately, I have been taking time to explore and research and I have learned so much about myself that it scares me a little. As a "baby sub" I am still learning to accept who I am and what I enjoy regardless of how unique,.for lack of a better word, it may be. It has been hard, being raised in a more conservative household I can at times feel guilt and shame because I don't have the reassurement that this is ok, that what I want and need is ok. I have discovered many kinks and scene that I want to try that make me excited. And while I know finding a trustworthy Dominant/boyfriend can be rare I have hope.

Another thing that I have learned is that I may be more into ageplay than I originally thought. These were the moments where I had to remind myself that as long as it is safe, sane, and consensual it is OK. I'm not sure I can be considered a little as I have not discovered a little space. However, I do want a daddy dom and I have an obsession with squishmallows, and the idea of a binkie is not unappealing. I'm also realizing I don't fall into one genre, which I'm sure is common, I've realized I may have a humiliation kink, and may even possibly be a masochist. Among other things, its nerve-wracking and scary.

Fortunately, I have an amazing friend that has stood by me and help me work through my guilt but its a little embarrassing to feel as if you need reassurance and aftercare after just watching a few scenes. But I am proud of mt improvements none the less.

Has anyone struggled with these things?

LaVieEnRose​(sub female){Kintsugi} • Nov 10, 2020

I think there are a lot of people here who have struggled with those feelings. I grew up in a conservative/religious household and there has been A LOT I’ve struggled to come to terms with because of the guilt and shame of it. The truth is you shouldn’t be ashamed of it, you’re not hurting anyone or anything and you’re not doing anything illegal.

Having the right support is important and once you find a truly amazing and supportive Dom it helps so much because you’re able to express things that you may not have even expressed to friends. It will probably take some time but don’t rush into it and don’t feel like you have to fit into anyone else’s box, be who you feel you are and as you explore more you’ll find yourself and the right person will fit you.

I find blogs to be helpful because it’s a great way to really express what’s going on and also people tend to be more responsive on there

Xx🥀