New and needing advice!

Dumbledore​(dom male) • Mar 17, 2018

"After a session a sub decided to go to the police and fill a rape assault. You got the contract agreement stating that sexual activities will be included in the session. You tell me know that legally the Dom will be prosecuted regardless of the signed contract? "

You don't even have to go search things so far... Marriage is a contract (I'm not talking about religious marriage) with very clearly implied "sexual activities". This is very broadly accepted worldwide. However, you can be (and people have been) prosecuted for rape in a marriage. Contracts cannot go against law; or otherwise said, the law governing rape and sexual assault supersedes any contract you may have with someone.

Now, when you tell a judge that BDSM comes into play, expect all rationalism to go straight out the door. BDSM is still a fringe activity and not understood by most people. So you will be _more_ likely to be convicted.

There is a very interesting case in Belgium of a _judge_ who played the Sadist in a relationship because his wife basically cornered him into it. She was getting depressed because he couldn't be Dominant / Sadistic towards her and in the end he relented and "learned" to give her what she wanted. They were found out, and even though there very obviously was consent and nothing was going on that could even be considered edge play, he was convicted and lost his job.

I think the only point a number of people here are making is, please enjoy making a contract. Just don't assume it's legally binding in _any_ possible way, because more than likely it _won't_ be legally binding, nor will it help you in any kind of context where someone from outside the relationship is involved.

Many Flavors of Beers....

CapnRick​(dom male) • Apr 13, 2018

....many feelings about contracts.

Perhaps worth noting is that some in our community thirst for, thrive on, protocols, rules and STRUCTURE. For those folks, contracts seem to fill a void, might even be essential..

Others are less into the 'rules' and the forms and the structures. They are more about getting on with it, building trust without many borders beyond safewords, SSC, and their own gut comfort levels of trust.

Neither group is "right". This is about what floats YOUR boat(s). So, whether the idea appeals and you 'need' a contract, OR seems like an unnecessary hassle you can do without, follow you own path and enjoy the journey together. Everyone has their favorite beer, or even wine....Hope this lighens the conversation a tad...