Everything subspace!

Everything subspace!

Nefertari​(sub female) • Jun 22, 2021

Hello beautiful people!

I am all new to the lifestyle and in the process of informing myself as much as I can.
I have read a few articles on subspace, but was interested in learning more about it, and others experiences. Both witnessing as a dom and experiencing as a sub.

Here are a couple of questions to get this topic going:

How do you know your sub is entering subspace, and what are you mindful about when they are?
How would you describe it, as a sub?
Can a sub be fully conscious about entering subspace, or being in it?
Can a sub chose to withdraw from entering subspace, or can they enter unvoluntarily?
Also, most articles describe it as a state of mind one enters during or after play, can it be triggered before play as well? Or would that be defined more as entering a state of submission?
How do you bring a sub back down from subspace, or what are things you as a sub can do to come back?

I'm all ears for all of your input.
Thanks in advance <3

Nef

Tessallia​(sub male) • Jun 23, 2021

so I'd say subspace is very different depending on how you get there. To start off I'd compare it to how Runner's high feels, which is the same mechanism just a very different situation. I've been in that runner's a high a few times, once while actually runner, and again while moving. I'll focus on the time that I was moving because it does illustrate something important about the sensation.
I was helping my new room mates move their stuff and well it was getting toward the end of the day. By this point I was tired and pretty sore but there was this shift sort of. I don't remember exactly how it felt moving into the high, but I remember noticing that I didn't feel sore anymore and that I felt amazing. I felt like I could keep on going for days. I had read about subspace and runner's high quite a bit before this and at this point I recognized the change in me. Still I'm a little stubborn, so I just kept on going. I kinda forgot the part where it was something that happens when your bodies at it's limit. I kept going until I actually couldn't keep moving. I was so sore the following day that I could barely move. So ya know lesson number 1, you're judgment will in all likelihood be impaired. Pair that with the dulled sense of pain and it's easy to push you're body too far.

Once playing with some friends I had a sorta of spacey feeling. Part of the play involved nipple clamps (the japanese clover clamps that pinch tighter when pulled), and when they were pulled off I couldn't help but think how it hadn't hurt as much as it usually did when they were on as long as they had been. It was such mellow and comfortable feeling here though. It wasn't the I'm on top of world like in the runner's high. Here I was some comfortable, and I just wanted to keep playing. I felt so comfortable and it was a very happy feeling. I had a pretty hard drop the day after when I woke up. I knew a lot more about this stuff from reading, but ya know I was kind of high at that point. It had been kind of spur of the moment stuff and not very well planned out.


"Can a sub be fully conscious about entering subspace, or being in it?
Can a sub chose to withdraw from entering subspace, or can they enter unvoluntarily?"

so think about it like getting drunk, except it's just something that happens in certain under certain conditions. push the body to the edge of what it can take, and it might happen. once or if it does, now you're drunk until you sober up.

it's been a while I've done any reading on it, and those stories were little over a year ago. That said they were very memorable, especially the subspace one. Idk I get kind of melty thinking about how I felt in the second story. I don't know if other people are aware of going into subspace or not. I am particularly attentive to patterns in my behavior and feelings. It just happens to be something that helps with my adhd if I can quickly identify those patterns.

Villanelle​(staff) • Jun 23, 2021

If you haven't already read it we have a great article about Drop (dominant & submissive) and aftercare in our Magazine here: https://thecage.co/magazine,85.html

Tessallia​(sub male) • Jun 23, 2021

I'll take a look at that especially since it's been a while since I've read anything about that, and I can't remember much about drop and aftercare. it's been pretty busy year.

BoredPanda​(sub female) • Jun 23, 2021

For me, subspace is a feeling I get when I'm actively letting go. I'm a highstrung, type A, boss bitch with high anxiety by nature. It isn't easy for me to relinquish that control.

As I submit to my Dom, I feel a shift. At first submission is mentally difficult and there is physical resistance. But then, it is like a weight falling off my body. I feel lighter and rawer. All the worries, stress, and stimulus from my day slip out of mind and I am anchored to the moment.

As I sink deeper into subspace, submission becomes reflexive and I'm emptied of conscious thoughts. Even after, I struggle to remember what I was thinking about or what I was feeling in the moment. It is a deeply powerful and intoxicating experience. And that is why aftercare is so important. I need to slowly awaken to my mind or it is overwhelming and unsettling.

Also,
As Tessallia mentioned, my pain tolerance is exponentially increased. This is especially true for my erogenous areas. ☺️

From my experience, you can't get to subspace by pure willpower. It is a feeling you find when not looking. So, my best advice is to simply enjoy the journey without putting pressure on yourself. You will know it when you get there.

Good luck!

cocklocked​(masochist male) • Jun 23, 2021

I'd echo some of what other people have said. For me entering subspace is like a blissful crossing over from an (annoying) ego state of autonomic resistance to pain, humiliation, pride etc - to a state of completely relaxing, letting go and giving up all control. I feel free, floaty and lighter and my mind and body definitely have a different relationship with each other. Sometimes I almost go out of body and observe what is happening as if disconnected. Its definitely a massive high. When I come out of it I need quiet time to settle because physical pain becomes more acute and I feel disorientated if I have to, for example, make any decisions or travel. I sometimes feel quite needy when I come down. I suppose its all to do with Adrenaline and so on. Its a beautiful natural high anyway.

CSI • Jun 24, 2021

Subspace for me has only happened a few times, but I describe it as floating away on a happy cloud where I cannot form coherent thoughts. There may be a split second when I know I am heading into it, but there isn't much I can do about it. I also can't do much to get out of it on my own. I have been told I become very much like a happy puddle when in it. I am unable to answer questions or use my safeword, so the tops I have worked with are cognizant and aware and have stopped all scenes pretty much as soon as I enter. They take me out of whatever predicament I am in and wrap me up and settle me in somewhere quiet and cozy.

DrWakko • Jun 24, 2021

There is no such thing as sub space. What everyone refers to as sub space is really bottom space. Its really bottom space because you enter this space during play when your endorphins and other chemicals kick in. To call it sub space implies that someone who just plays is unable to reach this level. Bottoms, subs, slaves, masochists, littles, pups, kitties can all hit this bottom space when they play.

MrFulmen • Jun 24, 2021

To zoom out one more level from what DrWakko said: There is no singular experience called "subspace" because different people use the word to refer to different kinds of experience. There are at least three rough categories of subspace that I see regularly discussed.

1. The endorphin high from physically challenging play.
2. Dissociation, where it seems like your thoughts switch off and you "get out of your own head."
3. Achieving flow state (look it up) while submitting.

Folks will talk about each one of these as "subspace," usually with no recognition that there are other very different things that are also referred to as "subspace," and that causes all kinds of confusion.

There are probably more versions as well. Those are just the three that jump to the top of my mind.

cocklocked​(masochist male) • Jun 24, 2021

I definitely get the dissociation a lot - that MrFulmen mentions. I think that is why I get disorientated afterwards and find it difficult to make decisions, travel etc. I referred to it as going out of body but 'dissociation' is the right word for sure.