Selling Nudes Online

Selling Nudes Online

DazzleDaddyD • Oct 8, 2021

So I’m in an on off relationship with a sub. I’m not going to lie it’s come with it’s challenges although we are now talking about getting back together. My issue is that she is currently using her submission online using it to send tiktoks and Snapchat’s with a wish list for men to buy her goods and deposit cash to her in return for nudes. She has assured me that she isn’t in any online sugar daddy relationships however I’m really tripped out by the whole thing as for me as a Dom i feel it lacks respect towards me and in a way that she would rather submit her submission online than in the real world.

How would others feel about this?

Villanelle​(staff) • Oct 8, 2021

It's worth noting here that this sort of behaviour would get you permanently banned at THE CAGE. We don't allow any sort of pay for play/photos/etc. or other types of financial exchanges.

Miki​(masochist female) • Oct 8, 2021

Red Light / Green Light on this one... If she is doing that, and you are uncomfortable with it, Stop- and speak up.

Remember: Stop, Look, and Listen. It's not just for kids...

If she stops doing this and you have a way of knowing she isn't blowing smoke up your ass, and you like the rest of what you know about her then go ahead, carefully.

--------------------

Personally, as I'm neither a dom nor a sub per se, and that I am neither in nor seeking a relationship, my thoughts come with a bag of salt.

I'd hit the ground running--- the other way.

Someone who posts nudes in places like that, well, I suppose they get a thrill out of it and it's "personal business" but that they sell this stuff?

nahh

Not my idea of anything other than a fling.

And one last thing, once anything of any nature gets "out there" on the Net.. it's there pretty much forevever --unless everything connected to "the Net" , ---from your computer, to their servers, to your fucking smart toothbrush-- (not invented yet but I'm sure some egg-head will come up with one) --simultaneosly implode into a molten pile of plastic and metal, that is..

An unlikely scenario short of Doomsday so yeah, it's out there for keeps and anyone who wants to throw in with a person who puts out that sort of material would have to accept that shit like this will leap out of life's toilet bowl and bite the person who crapped it out there square in the ass... As well as those affiliated with such a person especially if they're in a line of work that carries morals clauses and stuff.

Good luck! remember-- Stop, Look, and Listen and if you're cool with all that, go ahead carefully.


My two cents.

ButterfliesAndCuffs​(sub female){LJ} • Oct 8, 2021

I don’t know her of course but I doubt this is about her wanting to submit online. This is about her wanting to make some money using her body. After all, you can submit online without money being involved.
It’s up to you if this is a deal breaker or not. It’s a little worrisome for me that you don’t mention her safety being a concern for you, but rather just the feeling of disrespect to you. She’s potentially putting herself in danger.

DazzleDaddyD • Oct 8, 2021

We’ve had a conversation about her safety as that was my first concern. As far as she’s made me aware it’s all safe and above board. I guess I’m struggling as to where it sits with me. Part of me is into the idea if I’m honest but it’s keeping myself in check around it and allowing her the freedom to do as she pleases with regards to her content. I’m a new Dom so still finding my way so the advice given is really appreciated. Stop, look, listen, I like that a lot and will bare that in mind as I move forward.

Cressida Clytie​(masochist female){Taken} • Oct 8, 2021

I'm in ragging hormones tonight so I apologize if I might get brutal.

You said you are a new dominant. So let's look at it plain and simple. Imagine you are in a Vanilla relationship. You are boyfriends and girlfriends. Imagine her sending her whatever kinds of selfies to different men and benefiting financially from that.

You have to consider, is she in need of financial support? If she's not considering this as a "sugar baby duty" then, how do you call it then?

If you are not comfortable, speak up. Stand for yourself.

Remember you deserve what you tolerate.

I wish you luck on this matter.

SubtleHush​(sub female) • Oct 10, 2021

That isn't submission. It's marketing and making money---the easy way.

LOTS of younger folks (mebbe older but I don't see as much of that) go after financial doms or pay for play online stuff. Dommes seek financial tribute and gifts from would-be male subs. With all due respect, NONE of that tells me they are into anything that relates to Dominance or submission. They're just greedy folk who choose this over a real job. I know that sounds harsh and it is. Don't care. I'm not a fan of those who use others and this is a high form of usury.

So you two are on and off. And now for whatever reasons you may get on again.

I have to ask why? What is different this time?

On and off relationships usually go on out of loneliness or horniness. And off is usually because the same old tired problems that never got resolved before resurface and boom, you are off again. So no growth, evolution, and change. Certainly, no lessons learned or becoming a better person.

So don't say you are about to go on again, just say what it is. You are about to waste more time for want of sex and the illusion of Ds until it explodes again.

Looking at what people do vs what they say is a huge time saver. She likes what she is doing. It's a boost to ego and wallet. If she were going to stop doing it, wouldn't it be better for her to stop because of her own growth in maturity as opposed to promising it to another as a hook?

This is why I don't date smokers who promise to quit. I would always be waiting for them to quit and waiting for them to start again and always with a huge impressive list of why they went back. All because they had that list ready to go at the start.

Too often changing for external reasons is based on a contingency. "I only smoke if I am stressed so as long as there is no stress I won't start. But I keep a pack of cigarettes just in case." Versus, "I'm not smoking because it is right for me. I'll endure the challenges because this is important."

Quitting any bad behavior has to be for good self-motivated reasons else they don't stick. So no other person can really change someone permanently. What you can do is monitor and manage them which becomes a full-time job and in the end, if they choose the behavior over you it's off again anyway.

I think you already know this or you wouldn't have asked. So maybe work on yourself and improve your instincts (which sound like they are growing) so that the next person you are with matches your maturity and interests in authentic ds.

Lastly many believe that a submissive's behavior is a direct reflection on their Dominant partner. So ask yourself if her behavior does that. And does her behavior reflect you in a positive way?

Good luck with it.

H*