CallMeOz(dom male)
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2 years ago •
Jan 9, 2022
Just a thought
I saw a comment from a submissive in here recently, stating that being without a Dom is like being incomplete, or having a part of themselves, missing. To me, as a Dom, being without a submissive is like being a ship without an anchor. I feel I need the connection with a submissive to help me center, to focus. A Dom only has the power that is given to them by the sub. In the same way the sub, anchors the Dom, allowing them to support and care for the sub.
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Online now
Low{BLK OWND}
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2 years ago •
Jan 9, 2022
I have recently lost my Dom and I am crushed
I was collared for years The pain is excruciating I'm not sure what to do to keep my head above water Low hurts |
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Miki(masochist female)
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2 years ago •
Jan 9, 2022
Words to the Wise:
While being in whichever dynamic is fulfilling, neither should lose sight of the fact that being needy can lead to a co-dependance kind of thing.. Not all that great a situation.. Similarly-- neither ought ever underestimate themselves and their ability to enjoy life and pursue happiness without having to depend on a relationship with another. One can choose this path but it totally has to be a choice, not a need. Relationships of any kind should be complimentary, not supplementary. Disclaimer: 2 cents from one who is not interested in committed relationships. I get by just fine on my own. Everything I delve into in the realm of (for me-- Of course "Your results May Vary" as the fine print on every fucking super annoying snake-oil TV ad says--) -----sexual satisfaction is the icing, not the cake of life. |
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| MissA(dom female) |
2 years ago •
Jan 9, 2022
Re: Just a thought CallMeOz wrote: I saw a comment from a submissive in here recently, stating that being without a Dom is like being incomplete, or having a part of themselves, missing. To me, as a Dom, being without a submissive is like being a ship without an anchor. I feel I need the connection with a submissive to help me center, to focus. A Dom only has the power that is given to them by the sub. In the same way the sub, anchors the Dom, allowing them to support and care for the sub.
Same here |
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Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker}
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2 years ago •
Jan 9, 2022
Snipped for focus
Miki wrote: Words to the Wise:
... neither ought ever underestimate themselves and their ability to enjoy life and pursue happiness without having to depend on a relationship with another. One can choose this path but it totally has to be a choice, not a need. Relationships of any kind should be complimentary, not supplementary. Disclaimer: 2 cents from one who is not interested in committed relationships. I get by just fine on my own. I leave the possibility of a committed relationship open but it's never my primary "need" or motivation. It works very well because *if* one develops I'm pleasantly surprised and grateful. It also takes all "pressure" off in the getting to know you phase. I wasn't actively seeking either of my two doms (both of whom I married) and the way both relationships developed could easily be seen as a comedy of errors or as a kinky romcom movie. When push comes to shove though, the years have taught me that no one will take better care of me than me. ๐ |
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Richlydefined(sub female){Gardener}
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2 years ago •
Jan 9, 2022
As a submissive who's been alone for a very long time I can understand and sympathize. I've navigated life on my own for the most part and that feeling of incomplete doesn't go away but I don't feel as if my life is unfulfilling because I know and accept that it is simply a part of myself that I am unable to satisfy at this time. I always keep a lookout, I do my best to continue to meet people and be my best self but I know better than most that you won't always find someone who can meet that need. When it gets hard I try to remeber that while my role is a part of me, it is just a piece of the bigger puzzle and it's ok to work on different areas while I search.
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Dominus eius(dom male){LittleLott}
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2 years ago •
Jan 9, 2022
CallMeOz,
I agree with you and your description. However, I would (continuing your analogy) also caution that the wrong anchor can be as bad (or at time worse) than none. Look for and find your anchor, but also make sure itโs the right one - that goes for both sides of the /. |
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A Cloud(sub female){Owned}
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2 years ago •
Jan 10, 2022
I used to think everyone needed to experience being single to 'find' themself without being influenced by another. However, this merely stems from my own experience and does not necessarily apply to others. I learnt that some relationships are capable of fostering substantial independent growth alongside the development of the connection. It is such a fluid and diverse thing. We don't always need to be attached per se and different attachments fulfil our need to connect. All I can say is be open to changing, taking action and seeing things from different perspectives. Understand what will support you be the best you (forgive the cliche) at any given point and don't be afraid to step into that - single, casual or committed.
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