Blocking

FundamentallyDom​(dom male) • Jan 20, 2022

So there are definitely two sides to this debate and I can see both arguments.

I am a huge believer in a few principles, this is not to say they are the only good way to be, just that they appeal as a moral code to me.

1) Individual choice should be enabled and respected. People should get to make their own decisions.

2) Individual choice should not come at the expense of others, no one has a right to expect someone else to be put out for their benefit.

There are plenty more, but when it comes to blocking these two are important. I do fully agree that blocking should be an option, and I do agree that a reason for blocking doesn't need to be given. I do not naturally have a right to expect others to give me their time. It's lovely when they do, but when they do they also have the right to stop giving me that time at any point. I can't complain that I am unhappy with their choice not to give me time because then I am demanding they unwillingly give more of their time for my benefit.

So morally, I have to argue that anyone should be able to block at any point. I will also note that I have blocked people before. It isn't something I do super often, but it happens. So for those who see blocking as a sin I too am a sinner.

Now I did say I can see both sides, so far this has been pretty one sided. There are a couple of further points that I will make:

3) People should have a responsibility to not be a net negative on the world around them.

4) If someone makes a commitment they should hold to it, if they can't hold to it they should view it as their responsibility to deliver something at least as good as what they committed to.

Again, I want to emphasise these points are my views and not an absolute. I think these are the right way to approach life, but I fully accept there are many ways that work well.

So while I do believe people have the right to block, I think they should be aware that blocking can cause hurt and disappointment. That's not to say they can't or shouldn't do it. But they should consider others when doing it and if someone has said hey, I'll chat to you tomorrow, then suddenly doesn't that's a breach of a commitment, albeit it a casual one. I'm happy to discuss why I hold to the above principles with anyone interested, and even happier to debate their validity.

What it all boils down to for me is this: Anyone should be able to block anyone else, exempting where they have made some sort of commitment. We don't have a right not to be abandonned by others around us. The exception again is if a commitment has been made.

Those who do block have no right to expect the other side not to be hurt by the action. They might well be, and it's ok to be. If you are hurt by being blocked that doesn't make it right to try to hurt your blocker back. Choosing not to support with the knowledge that that lack of support will hurt is very different to choosing to directly hurt. We don't have a right to be saved by anyone, even from our own feelings about them, but we should have a right not to be directly hurt.

So, not blocking someone you don't want to talk to anymore and instead giving them some closure is a commendable act (if doing so will cause them less overall pain anyway). I see it as putting yourself out for the support of others. It's good, it's something that is nice, but it is not a requirement to do it.

In the end to me it comes down to this. I don't think there is a moral imperative to give to others, in need or otherwise. I do think doing so is commendable. I see blocking vs not blocking in a similar light.

Two posts in two days, this definitely goes against my lurker nature.

Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker} • Jan 20, 2022

Extreme snip for brevity:


First: Your two posts in the last two days are succinct and well-balanced. ☺️
Second: The way I read the original post was that the complaint was not about blocking someone with whom you had an established relationship of any kind but maybe I'm wrong.

Now, after reading some of these fairly "uppity" and scathing remarks decrying those of us who choose to use the feature, here's my take one more time.:

I use the block button with great zeal compared to some people here who seem to think it's a cardinal sin to cut off and forestall contact with those you find boorish and distasteful. I don't tolerate those who come at me with unsolicited and crude sexual advances of any kind here online anymore than I'll stand at a party and give them the time of day. I have even less motivation to do it online.

Frankly, I'm astonished that some people seem to think that engaging with these types is a game of some sort and that's it is an indication of what a good sport they are or how tolerant they are or how it's proof of their superior endurance/mettle. More power to them if those types of verbal gymnastics are their kink - however, I *am* surprised how few other people seem to find those types of messages distasteful or cause to block someone's overly bold and uncouth ass. 😉

Master Raf​(dom male) • Jan 20, 2022

Chuckles...

Notely • Jan 21, 2022

We could write whole story on it yes.

Some may not understand you .
Some may not be in your vibe.
Creepy not your kink.
Everyone not for everyone.
Rejection happens just keep moving we are not for everyone but someone will.
Yes some people could even block because the person could be everything but they feel they are not fit for them this also happens as well.
People will block if protects own peace just them why not might not be you they protecting themself from others or just wont work.
When person want's to know everything about you right away dig in to fast or trying get you do foolish things things that can get a person blocked.
Well when person sounds to good to be true but something not adding up right.
People do have right to person not respecting the person wishes.

The list can go on and on.

harleyqt​(sub female) • Jan 25, 2022

My guess is they're running away from their feelings or they just don't want to confront you. Either way it's weak imo. Especially if you're just blocking someone and they didn't do anything to warrant it.

dollMaker​(dom male) • Jan 25, 2022

The great shame is blocking and muting here, does not result in that person vanishing completely from the platform, one still sees their content in places, so its sadly not possible to manage one’s experience here fully.

Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker} • Jan 25, 2022

You are by *far* not the only person to feel this way. I looove Facebook for this very reason. One click of the block button and the offensive ones disappear as though off the face of the earth. It's so satisfying, and as you mentioned, greatly enhances ones enjoyment of the platform.

Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker} • Jan 25, 2022

*guffaws*

I'mME • Jan 26, 2022

@Taramafor

That is the definition of stonewalling, however, is not remotely the same as being blocked. The silent treatment is emotionally abusive, and I do/will not hesitate to keep repeating this over and over. I am not referring to people going to their respective corners (haha, see what I did there) for heated emotions to simmer down before people engage in communication.
Silent treatment/stonewalling is insidious. The person who is being subjected to this frets, worries, they do not understand why this person is doing this, they keep thinking what did they do (what did they do). It can get to the point to where it affects someones physical health, it literally can affect blood pressure, stomach, and cause headaches.

When it comes to a Dom treating a sub to this, I would not consider this person to be a Dom, period. How can you Dom your sub, lead them if you are ignoring them(rhetorical).

Blocking and silent treatment is 2 different concepts. I know because I have been subjected to both.

Master Raf​(dom male) • Jan 26, 2022

This is soooo true. They lament people who run away from feelings but they do it too.