Inflicting pain onto my sub

Inflicting pain onto my sub

bitesizeddommy • Feb 21, 2022

Hello,I have been with many sub men in my life, my current sub is really into pain, and even tho they ask for it, i find myself flustered and foggy. Does anyone have any advice?

MisterAshmodai​(dom male) • Feb 21, 2022

Practice.
Not everyone takes to inflicting pain right out of the gate. For most, it is contradictory to their nature.
It's growth, like anything else. Take it slowly and see what you like doing.
Find ways to practice between sessions. I have targets for my whips and other potentially damaging implements to practice accuracy and become familiar with eyeballing range and heft.
I use scalpels and knives when I cook food, especially pork (don't use the same blades on your subs, get doubles of everything).

Share your journey with your sub. Don't try to hide it and just show up knowing the deal. That will cause you to rush in, and frankly, sharing that development will bring you closer to that sub.

AidenS • Feb 22, 2022

I am “that” sub man

It’s hard to communicate that as a sub , if you ask for what you want and get it .. it’s a bit like you are the top telling the other guy what to do to you

When to be sub is to ( at least create the image that you ) submit to things you really don’t want... and to a greater or lesser extent the test of being a sub is how much you will submit to pain and unpleasantness or disgust/humiliating things

If you came hoping for something that would give you pleasure and you go away feeling you got what you wanted.. then who is the top and who is the sub..?

And what do you want from the other guy?

To give you what you enjoy?

Or to subjugate you to his needs irrespective of your feelings.. ?

Or to find the point at which you experience the sensation of being unable to do anything other than accept the treatment of a superior .. which may be designed to demonstrate and test you submissiveness by being stud you DONT like

Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker} • Feb 22, 2022

You seem to be describing your own preferred dynamic while the OP clearly has a more warmhearted approach in her interactions with *her* sub. The fact that she cares about pleasing him doesn't make her sub any less of a submissive nor does it make her any less of a domme. I prefer seeing dynamics where both parties have their needs met and share a healthy and mutual affection, personally.

AidenS • Feb 22, 2022

True

There are several possible different dynamic or approaches to it

The important thing is being clear about your own; and certain that you can trust the Dom with your “safety”... wherever you may draw your parameters of “safety”