incorporating bdsm into every day life and living

incorporating bdsm into every day life and living

hurtmeirl​(sub female){?} • Jun 5, 2023

Are there any folk who believe or feel that aspects of bdsm can be realistically and pragmatically incorporated into every day life and living???

Little Vixie​(sub female){Mgh30} • Jun 5, 2023

My dom gives me challenges. As a sub, I enjoy completing this tasks. Most of the times it's stuff to mess with me like 'no sex till we meet up again' or 'you have to ask permission to play with yourself". We've started getting into stuff that helps me out like "drink 64 oz of water a day'.

It doesn't have to be anything major.

Miki​(masochist female) • Jun 6, 2023

If by everyday life you mean out and about in public, at work, etc. Sure. It doesn't have to be anything major, and if tastefully done should be fine. The most I ever did was clothing, but I was never in a "dynamic'" so just clothing that hinted at me being a little twisted in private but not 'in your face" kind of shit. Leather skirts and of course a choker usually worked for me. But I'm sure others have other ideas on how to incorporate this into everyday life. However, for e "tasteful" is the operative term. No need to be a tease or attract excess attention.

trainerforsubs • Jun 6, 2023

Not wearing panties outside the house , whenever possible.

EpicParker​(sub female) • Jun 7, 2023

Absolutely! The lifestyle doesn’t have to be sexual all the time or anytime. With my dominants, I follow day to day rules, I wear different forms of collars, I perform service tasks that are non sexual. Some dynamics are completely platonic.

ControlYourHole​(dom male) • Jun 7, 2023

Oh yeah for sure! Some Doms love having their sub/slave’s day completely planned out for them (& they love it too since it gives them structure & clarity)…for ex, me and my wife have a free use/TPE dynamic (but it’s also not high protocol or that elaborate, some Masters/Doms will have it 1000x more specific lol) and a normal day for us includes-

-at least 3 times a day reserved for sex including first thing in the morning
-certain goals for her while I’m working, including housework & reading/spiritual studies (besides baby care which is a ton of that time lol)
-rewards & punishments for obedience & respect (or momentary lack thereof) daily.

Some subs NEED this, not just for sexual excitement in seeing their Dom get stern with them, but to feel like they are progressing in their path.

That’s just some super basic ways to keep the dynamic growing daily- if your sub loves pain & humiliation then making her wear nipple clamps or butt plugs discreetly in public would be fun too haha😎I’m interested to see what other folks do as daily kinky practices!

Love this

AmandaAlwaysNaughty​(sub female) • Jul 6, 2023

It makes me feel so naughty being told to go it without wearing panties

Ryliebling​(switch gender queer) • Jul 7, 2023

I have a rather interesting dynamic with someone that is centered around helping me improve my writing. The person will send me a word count that I have to reach, I have to submit what I have written. If I failed to write, and I don't have a reasonable excuse for why I didn't, I receive punishment.
Although the punishments can be sexual in nature, often times they are not. It's not much, but it's a great little dynamic that satisfies both of us. I often find that incorporating little things like this can help when learning to participate in more BDSM in your daily life. I respond really well to being given tasks and assignments, so I often find people who will do these kinds of things with me.

aPeepingMom​(sub female) • Jul 7, 2023

Absolutely!

I am required to send a good morning and good night message at the beginning and end of every day, no exceptions, unless we are physically together.

I must also tell/show him when I put on or take off my panties. And a new requirement is now to give him choices and he will decide which panties I wear.

It’s only happened once or twice, but I’ve been told to gag myself and meditate for a specific amount of time if I start getting overly emotional. At first I thought it was to shut me up, but it’s actually a way to help quiet my mind so I can breathe and focus.

I originally thought that I only wanted BDSM in the bedroom and it didn’t take long for me to realize that I need the D-to-my-s outside of the bedroom, more than I need it in the bedroom. He makes me a better person.

I'mME • Jul 7, 2023

D/s, M/s, O/p are all different types of power exchange relationships, those that have been together for years, likely would tell others that the sexual part of their dynamic is yummy but at the end of the day it is about 2 people one leading and the other who follows.